Welcome a Secret Subject Swap. This month 5 brave bloggers picked a secret subject for someone else and were assigned a secret subject to interpret in their own style. Today we are all simultaneously divulging our topics and submitting our posts. Read through mine and at the bottom you’ll find links to all of today’s other Secret Subject participants.
My subject is: You're going on a talk show because someone you know has something to reveal to/tell you (about yourself or someone else) or ask of you. What would you guess it would be for?
It was submitted by: Jenniy of Climaxed.
This prompt took me all the way back in time to the second ever Secret Subject Swap. My prompt was "You get invited to the Ellen DeGeneres Show to talk about . . ." At the time I wrote a post about appearing on the show, at the suggestion of the police, to beg for the return of my kidnapped boys. I never say, in the end of the post, whether or not they were ever returned, but I can tell you now that they were eventually, in fact, returned to me by their kidnapper, Adolescence. It took years, though.
This time Jenniy tells me that my appearance is for a very different reason. Someone I know has something to tell me or to ask of me. My mind immediately goes to the most common reason to be asked to attend the show as a guest for a reveal. But I'm not afraid, I'm pretty damn confident that, DNA or no, I'm not going to be named as anyone's baby daddy.
OK, maybe I'm a little afraid. Because like the baby daddy thing, most people who are ambushed on these types of shows, end up humiliated in some way or another. Publicly, of course. For sport. So I think if I were asked to be a guest on a talk show known for sensationalism, I'd probably just take a pass. Yes, I'd be curious but I'll have an easier time living with curiosity than humiliation.
Maybe I'm being asked to food-based talk show to share a recipe I've developed or interpreted. Or possibly even to be offered a show of my own.
Crispy Bundt Pan Roasted Chicken
But, unfortunately, that information wouldn't come from someone I know. Damn. I like that one.
I'm going to have to admit that I'm not up to date on talk shows as I don't watch them, close to none of them. Needing a little help, I consulted my go-to information guru, Google. So . . .
The View: No. My brain would probably explode listening to Meghan McCain before anyone got a chance to ask or tell me anything.
Nude Interviews (Yes, it's a thing. Would Google lie?): No. Just no.
Dr. Phil: No. Doctor, heal thyself.
Ellen DeGeneres: No. Been there, done that.
So much for Google.
For my big reveal, I've decided to go with a show my son loves, shares with me all the time, and (so important in this difficult time in history) makes me laugh. In a "politics has become so absurd it's as funny as it is sad" kind of way. John Oliver. I'm going on the John Oliver show. Final answer.
Clearly I'll be on with my family, but what for? To discuss the legitimacy of science, or legalizing marijuana, or any one of thousands of issues on which I have an impassioned position? As much as I might like to be able to have my say, there's no reveal or ask there. I know they're not going to reveal that College Boy set my car on fire 'cause, been there, done that. Or that PurDude broke his leg. Same answer. And John Oliver's show isn't the place for that.
I'm afraid the only conclusion I can come to is that one of my family members is going to reveal that they're running for public office.
Wait! Stop! I need a do over. This whole post, right from the beginning, I need a do over.
Turns out I'd rather be somebody's baby daddy after all.
Here are links to all the sites now featuring Secret Subject Swap posts. Sit back, grab a cup, and check them all out. See you there:
Wandering Web Designer
Part-time Working Hockey Mom
Climaxed
The Crazy Mama Llama
Crispy Bundt Pan Roasted Chicken
©www.BakingInATornado.com
1/3 cup canola oil
2 tsp salt
1/4 tsp pepper
1/2 tsp onion powder
1/2 tsp garlic powder
1/2 tsp crushed dried rosemary
1/4 tsp dried basil
1/4 tsp cayenne
1 tsp paprika
Directions:
*One hour before cooking, remove chicken from the fridge. Note the exact size of your chicken in order to calculate cooking time.
*Twenty minutes before cooking, preheat oven to 450 degrees. While the oven is heating, rinse the chicken inside and out, removing any packets. Pat dry. Cover the hole in the stem of a bundt pan tightly with 3 layers of heavy foil.
*Mix together the salt, pepper, onion powder, garlic powder, rosemary, basil, cayenne and paprika. Sprinkle about 1 tsp of the seasoning into the cavity of the chicken.
*Pour the canola oil into a small bowl. Mix in the remaining seasoning.
*With your hands, create a space between the skin and the breast meat on each side of the breast bone, being careful not to tear the skin. Pour a little of the oil/seasoning mix into each side and rub into the meat with your hand. Rub the remaining mixture onto the chicken skin, front and back.
*Place the cavity of the chicken onto the post of the bundt pan so it's standing straight up. Hold the pan up and make sure there is no tear in the tin foil and that it's completely covering the hole in the post.
*Place chicken in the oven and immediately lower temperature to 350 degrees. Bake for 25 minutes per pound. Before turning the oven off, check to be sure that the chicken is cooked. It's done when the juices run clear.
*Once the chicken is completely cooked, tent with foil and allow to rest for 10 minutes before carving.