Friday, August 29, 2014

August Funny Friday

Today’s post is August’s Funny Friday, a regular feature published on the last Friday of every month. Funny Friday is a collaborative project. Each month one of the participants submits a picture, then we all write 5 captions or thoughts inspired by that month’s picture. Links to the other bloggers’ posts are below, click on them and see what they’ve come up with. I hope we bring a smile to your face as you start your weekend.

Funny Friday  - Baking In A Tornado

Here’s today’s picture. It was submitted by Sanity Waiting to Happen.

Funny Friday - sanity waiting to happen

1. Ad in a local paper: “Freezer for sale. Contents included.”

2. Hubs to Wife: “I have good news and bad news. Good news, there’s plenty of berries in the freezer. Bad news: you may not ever want to use them.”

3. Child to Mom (who can’t hear him because she’s screaming her head off): “Can I keep him, Mom? Huh? Huh? Can I keep him? Plllleeeeeaaaaaassssseee, Mom?”

4. Snake to screaming woman: “Shut the door, you’re letting all the air conditioning out.”

5. Hubs to wife: “I have a surprise for you, a DIY project for your blog, make your own snake-skin purse.”

Click on the links below and let some other bloggers make you smile:


And now for something yummy:

 Seafood Angel Hair Florentine - Baking In A Tornado
Seafood Angel Hair Florentine

Enjoy your weekend!
Baking In A Tornado

Seafood Angel Hair Florentine
                                                                               ©www.BakingInATornado.com
 
Printable Recipe
 
Ingredients:
12 oz Angel Hair Pasta
1 1/2 cups uncooked spinach, cleaned and dry
3 TBSP butter
1 TBSP olive oil
3 tsp minced garlic
½ tsp dried red pepper flakes
1 # uncooked bay scallops
12 oz uncooked medium shrimp, peeled and deveined
1/3 cup white wine OPT: may substitute chicken broth
2 TBSP lemon juice
Grated parmesan
 
Directions:
*Cook the pasta al dente. Drain, return to pot and cover to keep warm.
*In a large saucepan, heat the butter and olive oil over medium heat. Add the garlic and red pepper flakes. Cook and stir about 3 minutes. Don’t allow the garlic to get brown.
*Add the scallops and shrimp to the pan. Turn the heat up a notch and cook for about 5 - 6 minutes until the scallops are white and the shrimp is pink.
*Add the wine to the pan. Cook for one minute until the wine is hot, then add the lemon juice.
*Add the uncooked spinach to the warm pasta and mix. Add the seafood and sauce and mix again. Top with grated parmesan.

Tuesday, August 26, 2014

What to Expect

Here it comes; emptynestdom (yes, I made that word up, feel free to use it) in all of its glory.

I was prepared with some pretty great books for What to Expect When You’re Expecting, What to Expect the First Year, What to Expect the Second Year and even What to Expect Before You’re Expecting.

But what do you expect after you’ve expected, survived the first year and the second year, not to mention the toddler years, the pre-teens, the teenaged years, the build up to college and more?

What do you expect when the school year starts and your kids are off at college? What do you expect when you’re expecting . . . well  . . . nothing.

I’ll tell you what I'm expecting:

* Silence. And it’s not golden. I’m rethinking that whole “don’t talk back to me, young man” thing. I think I’ll take the back-talk. I’ll start to talk to myself. Out loud. It'll become a habit and people will steer clear of me in department stores.


What to Expect - Baking In A Tornado

* Chores will take less time. There’ll be no picking up to do. There will be so much less laundry, not only because there are less people, but because no one throws clean clothes down the laundry chute because they’re too lazy to put them away.

* Dinner will be peaceful. No one complaining about what I'm serving. Even if it’s fish. Even if it’s fish twice a week. And no one is running off in the middle of the meal. Not to mention that every dinner will have leftovers so now I can cook once and eat twice.

* I may get to eat my own meal. I’ve suddenly realized that I’ve never been able to eat a whole burger before. Someone (well, two someones) always finished theirs and grabbed a quarter of mine.

* There’s no one to blame when the toilet paper roll runs out. There’s also no one there when I yell for someone to bring me another one. This one could be a bit of a problem.

* There’s a car in the garage when I want to leave. In fact, there’s two. And they have just as much gas in them as they did the last time I parked them in the garage.

* I plan to sleep through the night. The garage door won't be go up at 1:00 am, no one’s forgetting their key at 2:00 am, the toilet doesn’t flush at 3:00 am (well, unless it’s me), and no one remembers at 4:00 am whatever it is they need for the next day.

* I will actually get to taste me own baking. There’s no longer a group of teens standing by the oven waiting to grab the goodies between there and the counter. And oh, how I'll wish there was.



Dark Chocolate Chip Berry Bread Pudding - Baking In A Tornado
Dark Chocolate Chip Berry Bread Pudding
Dark Chocolate Chip Berry Bread Pudding - Baking In A Tornado


* I can no longer ignore my cell when it dings. It may ding every 2 seconds with social media updates and conversations but I'll now check it every single time. Just in case there’s a text.
* The in-house techie has left the building. And this is a very, very big problem for this blogger.
* The grocery store is already a difficult place to be. I have to keep taking out of the cart all of my kids’ favorite foods that I no longer need to buy.
* I'll need to find a new route home. For three years I’ve driven by the high school and smiled when I spot my child’s car. Now I already can’t bear to drive home that way.
* And the countdown, it's changed completely. I used to count down the days until they went off to school. Now I'm already counting the days until I see them again. 46 days as of today, in case you’re interested.

Hope I make it.

Baking In A Tornado 

Dark Chocolate Chip Berry Bread Pudding
                                                                      ©www.BakingInATornado.com
 
Printable Recipe
 
Ingredients:
1 (16 oz) loaf of Italian bread, coarsely chopped into cubes
4 ounces whipped cream cheese
8 eggs
3/4 cup hazelnut creamer
3/4 cup milk
¼ cup brown sugar
2 TBSP white sugar
¼ tsp salt
½ tsp cinnamon
1 # berries, cleaned and larger ones sliced
5 oz dark chocolate chips
OPT: powdered sugar, vanilla ice cream or whipped cream for topping
 
Directions:
*Grease a 9 X 13 glass baking dish.
*In a large bowl, whisk the cream cheese, eggs, creamer, milk, sugars, salt and cinnamon.
*Add the bread and mix until all of the bread is wet.
*Gently mix in the berries and dark chocolate chips.
*Spread into the prepared dish and cover with tin foil. Refrigerate for 4 hours or up to a day.
*One hour before cooking, remove dish from refrigerator and place on counter.
*Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
*Remove tin foil and cook for one hour.
*Remove from oven. Allow to sit for 10 to 15 minutes. Serve warm.

Friday, August 22, 2014

Fly on the Wall, August 2014

Welcome to a Fly on the Wall group post. Today 11 bloggers are inviting you to catch a glimpse of what you’d see if you were a fly on the wall in our homes. Come on in and buzz around my house.

Fly on the Wall - Baking In A Tornado

Last month College Boy stopped working for the Congressman. The primary was over and won and there wasn’t any work until the campaign was ready to gear up for the general election. College boy went looking for a job for the rest of the summer.
Here are some words I never thought I’d hear:
College Boy: Mom, I got a new job. There’s a guy working the job right now so they’re going to give me some temporary duties in a different department. Then when that guy goes to jail they’ll move me into the job.




Flies on the Wall - Baking In A Tornado


College Boy: Mom, I almost ran over a chicken on the way home from work last night. It jumped out of nowhere in front of the car.
Me: Do you know why you almost hit that chicken?
College Boy: No, why?
Me: It was trying to cross the road.
(College Boy treats me to a major eye roll)
Me: Do you know why it was trying to cross the road?
College Boy, while walking away and rolling his eyes: Lame, Mom. Lame.
Ba ~ dum ~ bump . . . ching. I’ll be here all week folks. Please tip your bartender and waitress.



Flies on the Wall - Baking In A Tornado


I had a dilemma a few weeks ago. I’d made a new recipe and we all loved it. It was for Bacon Cheddar Beef Rolls that I cooked on the grill. We all agreed that I should post the recipe to my blog, but every picture I took looked like poop on a roll. I kept envisioning them showing up on late night TV and the whole world laughing at the woman who posted poo on a bun. I tried decorating it, adding side dishes, whatever I could think of, but I’d ask my family and every one got the same response. Dinner was delicious but the picture looks like I’d gone fishing in the potty.
See:

Bacon Cheddar Beef Rolls - Baking In A Tornado


I took one final picture from a different angle and showed the boys.
Me: Well?
College boy: That looks less like poo.
PurDude: Yes, this one’s less poop-like.
So it’s come to this; “less poop-like” is officially a success. But I swear, if I see that picture on late night TV, I’m going into hiding.


Flies on the Wall - Baking In A Tornado


Me: I just did the laundry yesterday, how can 3 of your outfits possibly be in today’s wash?
College Boy: Mom, don’t ask questions you know you don’t want the answer to.
Point taken.


Flies on the Wall - Baking In A Tornado


PurDude: What’s for dinner?
Me: I’m trying something new. It’s actually a breakfast. I’m calling it a Crab Benedict Roll Up.
PurDude: That sounds interesting. But I don’t like asparagus, I want ham instead of Prosciutto and I don’t want the sauce.
Me: Sorry, you must have missed the part of the menu where it says “no substitutions.”
PurDude: Mostly I’m just asking you to leave off a few things.
Me: OK, you win.
PurDude: I have to work from 5:00 pm to 8:00 pm. Then I’ll come home and change and go to the gym from 8:30 pm till about 9:45 pm, so if you could make it for about 10:00 pm, that would be great.
Me: You better check that menu again. It also has our hours. The kitchen closes long before 10:00 pm. Sorry.
PurDude: No problem, I can still get dinner. I’m related to the owner . . .



 Crab Benedict Breakfast Roll Up - Baking In A Tornado
Crab Benedict Breakfast Roll Up


PurDude goes to the grocery store with me, a rare occasion. While there he sees frozen Arby’s Curly Fries and asks me to buy them. I do.
The next week I decide to make Leftover Night Steak Sandwiches for dinner and serve the curly fries with them. PurDude ends up working and, although he doesn’t know it, he missed having the fries.
Later that night he called as he left work to say that he was stopping to get a sub and wanted to know if anyone wanted anything. We’d already eaten so we were good.
He walks in the house with a bag and proceeds to tell me that the sub shop was closed. Although he knows that I already ate, he brought me something anyway. He stopped at Arby’s to get himself some chicken fingers and decided to surprise me with Curly Fries.

Flies on the Wall - Baking In A Tornado


Have you ever played “Red Light, Green Light”? Everyone moves on “green light” and has to freeze on “red light”.  A fly on the wall may have thought I was playing that game all alone this past month. This is how it went:
I suddenly realized that I will never, ever have to cover a school book again. No ripping up paper bags and measuring and cutting and folding and taping and labeling. This precipitated a spastic happy dance all over the kitchen and into the den.
I just as suddenly realized that in place of covering school books, I’m now PAYING for school books.
RED LIGHT!

Flies on the Wall - Baking In A Tornado


This is the exact conversation I had every day all summer long when PurDude got home from his Lifeguarding job.
Me: Hi, honey.
PurDude (putting his shoes into his locker): Tired.
Me: How was your day?
PurDude (walking through the kitchen): Tired.
Me: How’s the job?
PurDude (passing through the den): Tired.
Me: Do you have any plans tonight?
PurDude (heading up the stairs): Tired.
Me: Nice talking to ya.
Amazing that I can miss a non-conversation like this. But I do.

Flies on the Wall - Baking In A Tornado


This summer had me learning a lesson in perspective. All winter long, with College Boy away, we were a household of 3 drivers and 3 cars. We all had different schedules and no one’s suffered because we all had transportation.

College Boy moved back in for the summer and we were 4 drivers with 3 cars. Hubs needed his car for work. PurDude needed his car for word and he wasn’t on a set schedule, nor on the same schedule as any of the other lifeguards so he had to drive himself. College Boy got a job that paid better than anything locally and offered unlimited hours. But his job was a half hour from here and his hours were given to him the day before based on their need, so he had to take my car. I had to work anything I needed a car for around the boys’ ever-changing schedules. I was not happy about having 3 cars.

Then Hubs’ car needed an expensive repair. The week after, it needed another expensive repair. We decided not to put any more money into it. So then we were a family of 4 drivers with 2 cars. Hubs had to take my car to work and I was going to have to chauffeur everyone else with the other car.

It was only a few days later, on a Saturday, that I sent Hubs and PurDude out to find a car for Hubs. That day we were once again a family of 4 drivers with 3 cars. 
A week earlier I wasn’t at all happy to have 3 cars. 
One week later I was VERY happy to have 3 cars. Perspective.

Flies on the Wall - Baking In A Tornado


Any of you who know me or follow me on Facebook know (all too well) that I just got back from dropping my baby off at college 700 miles away.
I try to deal with stress through humor, so I'm trying to remember some of the little funny moments about dropping him off.
Before he left, PurDude and I went out to buy him a trunk. Not only is a wheeled trunk a great way to get his belongings into the dorm, but it works just as well these days as a table in the dorm room as it had in my day.
In the week before we left, we were talking about packing up to leave and decided that we couldn't buy a mini-fridge here. With his trunk, all his electronics, bedding and whatever else, I was concerned about fitting everything into my car.
Hubs: Well, it would take up less space if we put all of his clothes into the trunk.
Me: Of course we'll put his clothes into the trunk. What did you think I was putting in the trunk?
Hubs: Nothing. You said it was to be used as a table.
Me: And take it up there empty? In what universe does that make any sense at all?



Now click on the links below for a peek into some other homes:


Baking In A Tornado

Crab Benedict Breakfast Roll-Up
                                                                          ©www.BakingInATornado.com
 
Printable Recipe
 
Ingredients (for 2):
2 tortillas
approx. 10 spinach leaves, clean but not cooked
4 slices prosciutto
2 TBSP butter
2 eggs
salt and pepper to taste
4 oz cooked Lump crab meat
4 asparagus spears
 
4 tsp olive oil
1 tablespoon fresh lemon juice
1/2 teaspoon Dijon mustard
 
Directions:
*Warm the tortillas in the microwave for about 10 seconds.
*Put spinach leaves, in a single layer, into the center of the tortillas.
*Top the spinach with 2 slices of prosciutto each.
*Melt butter in a small fry pan. Crack an egg into the pan and break the yolk if you want. Swirl around in the pan. You want the egg to be thin, it can be as large as the tortilla. Sprinkle with salt and/or pepper to taste.
*Fry eggs to desired doneness, flipping if you prefer fried to sunny-side-up. Repeat with the second egg for the second tortilla.
*While egg is cooking, whisk the olive oil, lemon juice and Dijon together.
*When done, place eggs on the prosciutto.
*Put 2 asparagus spears in the center of each egg and a few pieces of crab on either side.
*Roll from one side to the other. The ingredients should be encased inside.
*Drizzle the sauce over the top. Serve immediately.