Functional Democracy

I am aware that we have not yet entered the Summer season, but believe me when I tell you that Fall is not all that far away. In case you've been living under a rock, let me be the first to inform you that here in the USA, we have midterm elections in the Fall. And maybe more than they have been in a very long time, these upcoming midterms are slated to be ugly, divisive . . . and critical.

I know that you will see this piece as being biased, and I suppose you'd be right to say so. But please do not judge until you've read the ending. Because although I have my own opinion, pretty clearly expressed here, it's not my point. The point is about all of us, our rights and responsibilities. Most importantly, it's about the fact that maintaining a democracy means that whether you agree with me or not, I value your right to vote according to your own conscience. In fact, I implore you.

In this country, in this moment in history:

we are normalizing lying.

we are normalizing bullying.

we are normalizing blurring the lines between church and state.

we are normalizing putting capitalism over protecting the environment.

we are normalizing allowing others to usurp women's right to drive decisions in matters of our own bodies.

and yet, once citizens are born and living, we are normalizing limiting our obligation to provide food to the elderly and those in desperate circumstances.

Glazed Mango Tart with Pistachios

we are normalizing the idea that the ability to access health care is an option not a right.

and yet we are normalizing being constantly forced to pay for golfing trips.

we are normalizing forcing our military to put on a show because one man wants to honor himself with a parade.

we are normalizing the idea that discrimination is acceptable, pretty much towards every minority in this country, be it religious, sexual orientation, gender or race.

we are normalizing manipulating the tax code to benefit the rich.

we are normalizing (and in some cases even denying) the shooting of our children.

we are normalizing the falsehood that gun safety law protection means doing away with the second amendment.

and yet when it comes to the first amendment, we are normalizing publicly targeting not only certain media outlets, but specific reporters by name.

we are normalizing alienating our global allies.

we are normalizing going from the most influential country in the world to being a laughing stock.

we are normalizing public attacks on our intelligence community.

If this is okay with you, register to vote.

If this is not okay with you, register to vote.

Glazed Mango Tart with Pistachios       
                                    ©www.BakingInATornado.com

Printable Recipe

Ingredients:
1 Pillsbury Crescent Roll Sheet
2 ripe mangoes
3 TBSP butter
1 TBSP brown sugar
1/2 tsp cinnamon
2 TBSP apricot jam
1/4 cup unsalted pistachios

Directions:
*Preheat oven to 375 degrees. Cover a baking sheet with parchment paper. Unroll the crescent roll sheet onto the parchment paper and flatten to about a 14 X 8 rectangle.
*Melt the butter and mix in the brown sugar and cinnamon.
*Skin the mangoes, remove the pits and slice. 
*Using a pastry brush, brush about 1/2 of the butter mixture onto the crescent sheet. Whisk the apricot jam into the remaining butter mixture and set aside.
*Arrange on the mango slices onto the crescent sheet, leaving about 3/4 inch edge. Brush the remaining butter and jam mixture onto the mango. Fold in the edges of the crescent sheet and pinch the corners.
*Bake for 20 minutes. Sprinkle with the pistachios. Serve warm.

Lightsabers and Starfighters: Funny Friday

Today’s post is this month’s Funny Friday, a regular feature published on the last Friday of every month. Funny Friday is a collaborative project. Each month one of the participants submits a picture, then we all write 5 captions or thoughts inspired by that month’s picture. Links to the other bloggers’ posts are below, click on them and see what they’ve come up with. I hope we bring a smile to your face as you start your weekend.

 Here’s today’s picture. It was submitted by Jules of The Bergham Chronicles.

1. Gigi to her snowman pal: I hereby knight you The Ghost of Christmas Future, now go out and get me all my future gifts.

2. Gigi to her snowman pal: OK, I'm holding it the way you told me to, now what should I do when Dad walks in?

3. Gigi to snowman: Toy sword? Are you kidding? Don't you know anything? This is a lightsaber. Really. Dude . . . you been living under a rock or something?

4. Gigi: May the force be with you.
Snowman: And also with you. Is that what I'm supposed to say? Like in church?


5. Gigi to Snowman: Hey, R2-D2 . . . bleep, bleep, blop, bloop.
Snowman: Are you talking to me, Gigi? 
Gigi: I am Leia. Bleep, bleep, blop, bloop, R2-D2, I'm speaking your language.
Snowman: Speaking my language? I thought you were making up new sounds.
Gigi, calling to her mom: Mom, we need to return R2-D2, he's defective.
Mom, walking into the room: Yes dear, come eat dinner then I'll have dad fire up the Delta-7 Jedi Starfighter.
Gigi (whispering to herself): Best mom, ever!



 And now for something yummy: 

Thai Shrimp Skewers

Click on the links below and let some other bloggers make you smile:

Southern Belle Charm
The Bergham Chronicles
Cognitive Script 

Thai Shrimp Skewers

   ©www.BakingInATornado.com

Printable Recipe

Ingredients:
2# large shrimp, peeled, deveined, tail on
1/2 cup sweet chili sauce
2 TBSP soy sauce
1 tsp minced ginger
1 tsp minced garlic
1 green onion, chopped
1 red pepper, seeded, chopped (large pieces)
pineapple chunks (fresh or drained from a can)

Directions:
*Place the shrimp into a resealable plastic bag.
*Mix together the chili sauce, soy sauce, ginger, garlic and green onion. Pour into the bag with the shrimp. Very gently turn to cover all the shrimp. Refrigerate for 2 to 4 hours.
*Preheat your grill to medium heat.
*Remove shrimp from marinade and skewer with the red pepper and pineapple. Place on the grill and cook for about 2 minutes per side or until the shrimp is pink and completely cooked.

BS at PU

When things get really rough, when I'm so stressed or angry or sad (or all three, depending on what's going on at any given time) that I can feel my blood pressure about to blow the top of my head off, I always say the same thing "please, dear G-d, just let me live long enough to get my youngest son through college." 

If you read this blog and/or follow my Baking In A Tornado FB page regularly (you do, right?) you know that last weekend it happened, PurDude graduated. Not really sure that bodes well for my whole head explosion situation. In retrospect, maybe I should have thought a little longer term.
 

I struggled, 4 years ago, when (after my older son chose a college about an hour away) we packed my youngest up and drove him to school 10 hours away. It was bittersweet, setting up his room, and as you knew I would, lining his window sill with 9 dozen cookies for his new friends and crying the whole way then driving home without him.

Dark and White Chocolate Oatmeal Cookies

Four sometimes devastating and often equally delightful years later, we went up to Purdue last week to reverse the process. He's living in a house with a couple of friends instead of a dorm this time, but cookies once again included, of course.

We spent the weekend walking the campus, meeting more of PurDude's friends and visiting some of our favorite places. I'm going to have to admit here, as a mom, that there were places I could have lived without seeing. He'd sent me pictures of the outside of the house he was renting and it certainly was run down looking, but that's part of the whole student experience (or so I thought). I also thought I was paying rent for him to live in a house and all this time it turns out it was a cave. And that bathroom? I may need therapy. 

Speaking of therapy, Purdue has just the place. There was no question that we'd be stopping by Paddy's Sweet Shop for one of their famous milkshakes. This place is so cute, isn't it? 

 And we had our share of laughs. Like when we saw this bike and PurDude explained to us that on campus if you leave your bike without locking it up, it won't be where you left it. Don't worry, it wasn't stolen. Everyone knows to just look up.

 Graduation was amazing. I have to admit I've never been this entertained by a commencement before. Purdue has produced more astronauts than any other school and it happens that 2 are on the International Space Station right now. One of them received an honorary doctorate and since our son's degree is from the school of science, it played out in the graduation ceremony (one of six in total) that we attended. This segment of the graduation was actually done through a live hook-up to the Space Station and concluded with the astronaut addressing the new graduates. NASA even covered it live on their TV channel also.

If you want to see it, the link is to the video on the Purdue FB page is HERE. If you don't want to see the whole commencement, you can scroll forward to the Space Station part. If you do watch it, watch to the very end (even after the waving), it's pretty funny in places, and I love how it ends.

 The highlight for us, of course, was hearing our son's name called and watching him cross that stage to receive his degree. A Bachelor's Degree in Science with a major in Computer Science and a minor in Organizational Leadership Skills. GPA: 3.2. Yeah, I may be just a little proud.  
 
Among the many obligatory pictures we were sure to get one of PurDude and Neil Armstrong. Now they are both Purdue alumni.

And then it came. Time to say goodbye to his friends and his housemates and work on packing up to come home. We had limited space, his car and our SUV and that's it. We looked into renting a small truck but driving it one way would cost about 5 times what we paid for the items we'd be taking. Cheap college furniture is easily replaced. We had room for one large piece so PurDude had a decision to make, which had the most sentimental meaning to him. 

He was living in a house with 2 roommates so he did have some furniture that we'd bought him: a mini fridge, a desk, a futon, an air conditioner. Whatever he didn't take he was donating to his frat brothers. None of what we bought was expensive and all had served him well for 4 years so it didn't matter to us what he decided to keep. 

So what did he do? In the end it wasn't furniture we had bought him that came home with us after all, it was something he'd acquired along the way.

Why yes, that actually is a Kegerator sitting in my garage. 

Oy.

But if you go inside my house, climb the stairs and walk into the room on the left, there you will find my boy. Temporarily, of course, but for now all is right in my world. Perfect, in fact.

Dark and White Chocolate Oatmeal Cookies

                                                                       ©www.BakingInATornado.com

Printable Recipe

Ingredients (makes about 3 1/2 dz):
1/4 cup dark chocolate chips
1 stick butter, softened
1 stick margarine, softened
1 cup sugar
1/2 cup brown sugar
1 tsp vanilla
1 egg, room temperature
1 3/4 cups flour
2 TBSP baking cocoa
1 cup quick oats
1/2 tsp salt
1 tsp baking soda
1 cup white chocolate chips

Directions:
*Melt the dark chocolate chips until smooth when stirred.
*Cream the butter, margarine, sugar, brown sugar and vanilla. Beat in the egg and melted dark chocolate.
*Slowly at first until incorporated, beat in the flour, baking cocoa, oats, salt and baking soda. Mix in the white chocolate chips. Wrap in plastic wrap and refrigerate for an hour.
*Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Cover baking sheets with parchment paper.
*Roll the dough into about 1 inch balls. Place on the baking sheets and press down gently with the heel of your hand. 
*Bake for 12 minutes. Cool on the baking sheet for 2 minutes before removing to cool completely.

Drop Everything and Do What, Now?: Fly on the Wall

Welcome to a monthly Fly on the Wall group post. Today 4 bloggers are inviting you to catch a glimpse of what you’d see if you were a fly on the wall in our homes. Come on in and buzz around my house. At the end of my post you’ll find links to this month’s other participants’ posts.

Me: Blech.
College Boy: Blech?
Me: I have a bad taste in my mouth. I put conditioner on my hair in the shower and some splashed into my mouth.
College Boy: I'm sure you brushed your teeth, try putting something strong tasting in your mouth.
Me: Like I should eat an onion?
College Boy: I was thinking more of a shot of bourbon.

And just like that I finally see that this kid is a chip off the old block (hint: me)!

I'm eating pistachios when College Boy walks in the room.

Me: Do you want some pistachios?
College Boy: No, I don't like them.
Me: You don't like pistachios? Everyone likes pistachios. What's wrong with you?
College Boy: I'm not nuts. . .

ba dum bum.

Hubs got me a new phone in March. I was going away for 2 weeks, my old phone had died and he didn't want me traveling without one so he ran out and picked one up.

Me: I want you to return my phone.
Hubs: What? Why? You don't like it all of a sudden?
Me: It's mocking me. 
Hubs: Huh?
Me: It dings for no reason. It's only supposed to alert when Baking In A Tornado has an email or when I have a text. 
Hubs: Okayyyyyy . . .
Me: But now it will sometimes ding and I go check it and nothing. No email, no text, no message of any alert at all. It's mocking me.
Hubs takes my phone and walks upstairs.
Me: Why are you going upstairs? Are you going to return it?
Hubs: How about I give it a stern talking to and put it in a time out?
Me: Ummmm . . .
Hubs: Well, it worked with the kids.

My eyes and my ears have been failing me. Well, and my knees and my memory too. And head, shoulders knees and toes, knees and toes . . .

Anyway, I listed a few instances last month of things I'd misheard or misread. Here are a few more:

I was working on my laptop with the TV on the other evening and a commercial came on. Not fully paying attention, I looked up when I heard an older woman saying "I'm a spider".

Me: Huh? Did she say she's a spider?
Hubs: Fighter. She said she's a fighter.
Me: Ah, OK, carry on.

Another day I was looking at a list of April silly holidays. You know, like the recent post I wrote called Found My Day about Blame Someone Else Day. So I was reading through the days and was stopped short. What the hell? There's an upcoming Drop Everything and Breed Day? Huh? No way!

Yeah, no way. It's Drop Everything and READ Day, btw.

I had made a few desserts for Passover and Hubs wanted to try the pie in the fridge.

Hubs: What kind of pie is this?
Me: Tropical Fruit Pie.
Hubs (looking at the pie): So there's matzo in this?
Me: No, no matzo, just normal ingredients, things we can eat on Passover. There's a walnut crust and the pie is like a Key Lime pie but it's Pineapple.
Hubs: Oh good, I like Key Lime Pie.
Me: But it's not Key Lime flavored.
Hubs (disappointed): No? You said Key Lime.
Me: It's that consistency, but it's pineapple flavored, I wanted to try something different.
Hubs: You could have made Key Lime.
Me: How would that be different?
Hubs: Well, Key Lime would be good.
Me: WHAT? Jeez, can't you at least take a bite before you start the insults?

Later . . .

Hubs: Came out good. 
Me: Gee thanks.
Hubs: For not being Key Lime.

Tropical Scones

After brunch, I handed my husband my camera and the manual.

Me: My flash isn't working. I know I must have just pressed something. Can you figure out what and make it work again.
Hubs: You can't figure it out? 
Me: I didn't even look. You know I hate all that boring stuff and you like reading dry informational manuals.
Hubs: No I don't.
Me: Yes you do.
Hubs: No, I don't.
Me: Yes, you do.
Hubs: You're going to say that I do as many times as I say I don't, aren't you.
Me: Yup.
Hubs: Guess I'll stop standing here and go figure out how to get your flash turned back on.
Me: I knew you would.
Hubs: Seems like you did.

If you make me angry enough, I tend to get sarcastic. I'm not the most patient person in the world, but I don't just fly off the handle either.

We had problems with our internet, so we'd had to go in and change the password for our router, then re-sign in on our phones, Kindle, laptops . . .

I went to use the printer a few days later and could not. I realized that it probably had to do with having reset our password. I had to google what to do, it got quite technical and I started to sweat. There was a good chance I'd do irreparable harm.

While going through the steps, there was a knock on my door and a ringing of the bell. I peeked out from the office, saw a salesman, decided not to answer and went back to what I was doing. Another knocking and ringing, which I ignored. A third ringing and I was mad. I abruptly opened the door.

Salesman (with a big smile and a jolly voice): Are you the lady of the house?
Me (less than jolly, to say the least): No, I'm the garden gnome.

He was still standing there with his mouth open when I shut the door. 

I have no idea what College Boy was dreaming about, but he came down the stairs and imparted this little bit of wisdom:

College Boy: Mom, I don't punch babies and I expect you to do the same.

Anyone who reads this blog knows how I'm always trying to get him to write me a guest post so I answered him.

Me: Son, I do write blog posts and I expect you to do the same.   

 

I was watching Beat Bobby Flay on the Food Network. Two contestants cook a dish and the winner goes up against Bobby Flay making a dish of their choice. There's a blind taste test and a winner.

College Boy: Could you beat Bobby Flay, Mom?
Me: I don't think so, honey.
College Boy: You need to be more positive.
Me: I'm positive I could not beat Bobby Flay.
College Boy: Really, Mom?
Me: Not if he had one hand tied behind his back . . .

College Boy went out with friends and came in the house at around 1:00 am. I heard the garage door go up and figured (correctly) he didn't have his key with him. I waited to hear the garage door go down again, but it didn't.

I went downstairs to find him in the garage pressing the button, but the door wasn't moving. I had to go out there, figure out what was wrong, make the adjustment and get the door to close. 

College Boy: I had a few beers.
Me: I figured.

College Boy: I know they say not to operate heavy machinery when you've been drinking. but I didn't think they meant garage doors.

Now click on the links below for a peek into some other homes:

Menopausal Mother 
Never Ever Give Up Hope 
Spatulas on Parade

Tropical Scones         

                                    ©www.BakingInATornado.com

Printable Recipe

Ingredients:
3 cups flour
1/3 cup sugar
3/4 tsp salt
1 TBSP baking powder
1/4 tsp cinnamon
1 stick butter, sliced
1/3 cup peeled mango choped
1/4 cup dried sweetened pineapple, chopped
2 eggs
2/3 cup milk, divided
1 tsp pineapple, rum or vanilla extract or 1/2 tsp almond extract

2 TBSP butter

Directions:
*Place parchment paper onto a baking sheet.
*Add the flour, sugar, salt, baking powder, cinnamon and 1 stick of sliced butter into a food processor. Pulse a few times until crumbly. Move to a bowl.
*Gently mix in the mango, pineapple and cashews.
*In a small bowl, whisk the eggs, 1/3 cup of the milk and the extract of your choice. Add to the dry ingredients and stir just until incorporated. Add only as much of the rest of the milk, if you need any at all, as you need just until the dough comes together. You want it moist but not wet.
*Turn the dough onto a floured counter, flour your hands and knead a few times, just until the dough holds together.
*Move to the baking sheet and gently form into a rectangle approximately 8 1/2 inches by 6 inches. Cut the width in half and the length into 3 equal pieces so you end up with 6 rectangles. Cut each into 2 triangles. Gently move the pieces apart a bit.
*Place the baking sheet into the refrigerator for 1/2 hour.
*Preheat oven to 375 degrees.
*Melt the remaining 2 TBSP butter. Brush onto the scones. Place in the oven and bake for 30 minutes. Remove from oven and allow to cool slightly. Serve warm.

Friendship, Debt and the Self-Preservation Clause

There are songs, poems, stories, memes, cliches and sayings about the value of friendship, so I don't have to tell you about all of the benefits. But you know what? It's not all sweetness and light and unquestioning support. There, I said it. Sometimes the relationship is difficult, sometimes strained, and sometimes . . . well, sometimes friendship is a battle of wills, a negotiation.

Lynne: No.
Me: No?
Lynne: Hell no.
Me: What do you mean?
Lynne: I mean I'm not doing it.
Me: But you owe me.
Lynne: Owe you?
Me: Remember last month when I . . .
Lynne: (interrupting): Yeah, I know, and I thanked you a million times but . . .
Me (interrupting): But?
Lynne: But "I owe you", that's just something people say.
Me: No it's not.
Lynne: Yes, it is.
Me: No it's not, it's a debt. And I'm calling it in.
Lynne: It's not a debt, it's just an expression of gratitude.
Me: Well, if you're grateful, you return the favor.
Lynne: There are limits.
Me: Limits?
Lynne: Some things shouldn't be done. 
Me: I know. And maybe this is one of them.
Lynne: Not sure I want to find out the hard way. 
Me: Really? Even for a friend. One you owe . . .Lynne: I thought we already settled that debt thing.
Me: Fine, no debt. But we're good friends, friends do things for each other. Like last month when I . . .
Lynne (interrupting): Friends do things for each other, but not anything. Not something that will be too difficult for them to handle. There are risks. And repercussions.
Me: Risk? Repercussions?
Lynne: Yes, repercussions. I mean, I'd then have to go on with my day as if nothing happened.
Me: Seriously? Do I say "no" to you?
Lynne: Have I ever put you at physical risk?
Me: Probably.
Lynne: We're friends so you know that in some dire situations, you just have to say "no".
Me: You're invoking the self-preservation clause?
Lynne: No, as someone who cares about you, it's my responsibility to deter you from something that could be traumatic.
Me: I know but . . .
Lynne (interrupting): Ask me something else. I know, I can save you shopping, time and energy and make the snack for you for our book group on Friday? I'll even make your recipe. How about those Raspberry Sunflower Seed Oat Muffins? 

Raspberry Sunflower Seed Oat Muffins

Me: Oh, cool, you can do that too.
Lynne: Too?
Me: Well, since you're volunteering and all . . .
Lynne: I'm volunteering to help you out in place of your putting me in peril.
Me: So now this is a negotiation? You're going to repay me by doing what's easier for you instead of what I need?
Lynne: Need? You don't need . . .
Me (interrupting): Well, yes. I need your support. We both know this is something I can't do alone, I wouldn't do alone.
Lynne: Fine, you shamed me into it, I'll do it.
Me: You'll do it? 
Lynne: Under duress. And against my better judgement.
Me: I don't know. Now you made me feel bad. What if you're not able to make it through the rest of your day . . .
Lynne: I won't be alone. I don't think you will either. And it will serve you right. 
Me: Well, if it's too painful we can decide to never do it again.
Lynne: Fine. We'll jog at dawn. 
Me: Thanks. I owe you.

I'm not sure which was more difficult, getting up at dawn, or actually running for 2 miles. But she was right, neither one of us was walking well for the rest of the day. Guess we'll put that in the "never again" column.

And I don't really owe her, right? I mean, that's just something people say . . .

Raspberry Sunflower Seed Oat Muffins        
                                    ©www.BakingInATornado.com

Printable Recipe

Ingredients:
1 cup quick oats 
1/4 cup shelled sunflower seeds
1 1/2 cups flour
1/2 cup brown sugar
1 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp salt
1 1/4 cup milk
1/4 cup Greek yogurt
1 egg
2 tsp lemon extract
1/2 cup fresh raspberries, quartered 

1/2 cup powdered sugar
1 TBSP lemon juice
1 TBSP water
2 TBSP sunflower seeds

Directions:
*Preheat oven to 400 degrees. Insert muffin paper cups into 12 muffin tins and gently spray the interiors of the paper cups.
*Mix together the oats, 1/4 cup of sunflower seeds, flour, brown sugar, baking powder, baking soda and salt. Whisk together the milk, yogurt, egg and lemon extract, then mix in just until incorporated.
*Fold in the raspberries. Divide the batter into the prepared muffin tins.
*Bake for 20 minutes or until the center springs back to the touch. Cool completely.
*Mix together the powdered sugar, lemon juice and water. Spoon over the cooled muffins. Sprinkle with the remaining sunflower seeds.