Friday, November 28, 2014

November Funny Friday

Today’s post is November’s Funny Friday, a regular feature published on the last Friday of every month. Funny Friday is a collaborative project. Each month one of the participants submits a picture, then we all write 5 captions or thoughts inspired by that month’s picture. Links to the other bloggers’ posts are below, click on them to see what they’ve come up with. I hope we bring a smile to your face as you start your weekend.

Funny Friday | | #MyGraphics

Here’s today’s picture. It was submitted by The Momisodes:

Funny Friday featured on

My five captions:
1. Dog to his owner: “NOW do you believe I want a sex change?”

2. Dog to his owner: “Trick or treat.”

3. Dog to his owner: “OK, I’m ready, lets go for our walk. Can we go by that Mastiff’s house?”

4. Dog to his lawyer: “I want to sue my family for mental anguish and duress.”

5. Owner to the dog: “What exactly do you do all day while I’m at work?”

Click on the links below and let some other bloggers make you smile:

And now for something yummy:

Sweet-Hot Veggie Bread Grilled Cheese | | #recipe #lunch
Sweet-Hot Veggie Bread Grilled Cheese

Enjoy your weekend!

Baking In A Tornado signature | | #MyGraphics

Sweet-Hot Veggie Bread Grilled Cheese
Printable Recipe
Ingredients (per sandwich):
2 slices of Veggie Bread  (recipe HERE)
1 ½ tsp Stone Ground mustard
1 ½ tsp apricot jam
2 slices Pepper Jack cheese
1 TBSP butter, divided
*Put bread slices into the fridge for an hour before making the sandwich. Wisk together mustard and jam.
*Remove bread from fridge and gently spread mustard mixture onto the slices.
*On one slice of bread, place the 2 slices of cheese.
*In a frying pan, melt half of the butter over medium heat. Place the slice of the bread without the cheese (mustard side facing up) into the pan and gently swirl around just so the bottom is buttered, then immediately remove from pan. Place (buttered side up) onto the sandwich.
*Melt the other half of the butter in the same pan. Place the sandwich into the pan (buttered side up). Allow to cook until the bread browns and the cheese starts to melt. If the bread browns too fast, you may need to turn down the heat a bit.
*Using a large spatula, carefully flip the sandwich over so the buttered side is now browning.  Leave in the pan until the other side has browned and cheese is melted.

Tuesday, November 25, 2014

Holiday Gift Guide

We’re just two days from Thanksgiving and my younger son will be coming home tomorrow. This is such an exciting time of year.

But it’s also a stressful time of year. Holiday shopping will start for many of us and wind down for others. This year many retailers have announced that their stores will not be open on Thanksgiving (can I get a “yay”?).

The internet though? That’s always open. Even though online there’s always a place to shop, it’s not always the availability of shopping outlets, but finding just the right gift for that loved one. Not the same old, same old, something truly unique.

So I’ve done it for you. Slogged through the world wide interwebs to find some . . .  different . . . gifts for all of those special people on your list. One stop shopping, too, I found them all on Amazon. So here they are, gifts for all. I’m even providing links to each item, as long as they’re still in stock you can jump right over:

Flingshot Slingshot Flying Screaming Monkey:
This slingshot monkey screams as it flies through the air. I’m sure this will provide hours of fun for any child, indoors or out. Anyone with kids is used to hearing screaming but as far as aim goes? You may want to put away those holiday decorations.
Find it here.

Emergency Underpants Dispenser:
Looks like a tissue box so no one will ever know, but this actually dispenses emergency unisex underwear. Five of them.
I actually have something very similar that also dispenses emergency underwear. It’s called my purse.
Oh, and be careful, these do come with a warning: they are a choking hazard, not for kids under 3!
Find it here.

Shittens Disposable Mitten-Shaped Moist Wipes:
Because “no one wants poop on their hands.” Especially during the holiday season.
Find it here.

Bacon Body Wash:
Now this doesn’t seem to come with any warning, but I don’t think this would make a good gift for your friends who like to go camping. Or frequent the zoo.
Find it here.

Holiday Gift Guide | | #MyGraphics

Everybody Poops 410 Pounds a Year:
We all have a book lover on our list and here’s just the thing for yours. And a real bonus, this book is illustrated!
Find it here.

Willy Warmer:
Show the men in your life just how much their man parts mean to you this cold holiday season. The Willy Warmer comes in “one size fits most” and is described as “crocheted in red soft yarn to give that Grandma feeling.” Because everyone’s Grandma used to crochet them pee pee pockets, right?
Find it here.

Generic Weener Kleener Soap:
For the distinguished man who has everything, donut shaped soap for that special man’s special part. Rub-a-dub-dub.
Find it here.

BARFume Puke Spray:
This is a highly concentrated product so a little bit apparently goes a long way. What a perfect gift for the procrastinator on your list. You know, the college student who didn’t do their paper on time or that young professional unprepared for a meeting. All they need to do is spray themselves, run out of the bathroom and voila, they’re excused from their responsibilities.
Find it here.

Maybe You Touched Your Genitals Hand Sanitizer:
Maybe they did and maybe they didn’t. Now you don’t have to ask, just be sure everyone you know has a bottle of this.
Oh, and you better hurry, last time I checked there were only 5 bottles left.
Find it here.

Road Rage Megaphone:
Personally, I have no problem saying exactly what I’m thinking, even if it is in the privacy of my own car and with the windows rolled up and the door locked. But for your more meek friends, this megaphone will say it for them. Loud and proud.
Note: You may want to get this gift in tandem with some good quality protective gear . . . or a cemetery plot.
Find it here.

Doody Head Velcro Cap Poo Flinging Game:
For all the festivities you’ll be attending, you’re bound to be the star of the show when you arrive with this great way to get the party started. Game includes two “doody” hats and three “doodies”. Strap on your hats and throw doodies onto your opponent’s head.  No better ice-breaker than trading doodies with a stranger.
Find it here.

Inflatable Fruitcake:
And, of course, a hostess gift. This vinyl fruitcake is marketed as being inedible, just like the real thing!
Find it here.

OR you can always bring my Lemon Raspberry Mini Pies:

Lemon Raspberry Mini Pies | | #recipe #pie

Lemon Raspberry Mini Pies | | #recipe #pie

Lemon Raspberry Mini Pies

No need to thank me, it was my pleasure to help you with all of your shopping needs!
 Baking In A Tornado signature | | #MyGraphics


 Lemon Raspberry Mini Pies
Printable Recipe
2 sticks of butter, softened
1 cup powdered sugar
1 tsp raspberry extract
OPT: 1 tsp raspberry liqueur
2 cups flour
¾ cup seedless raspberry jam
OPT: 1 TBSP raspberry liqueur
3 egg yolks
1 can sweetened condensed milk
1/3 cup Lemon juice
1 cup heavy cream
3 TBSP powdered sugar
½ tsp lemon exctract
OPT: 2 TBSP Limoncello
NOTE: Use the 3 egg whites to make my Strawberry White Chocolate Chip Meringues (cookies). Click HERE for the recipe.
*Beat butter. Mix in powdered sugar until just incorporated, add the lemon extract and beat until smooth. Mix in the flour. Wrap in plastic wrap and refrigerate for 30 to 45 minutes. You want it pliable but not hardened.
*Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Grease a 12 muffin cup tin.
*Remove cookie dough from fridge and divide into 12 pieces. Place each piece in a prepared muffin tin and gently press into the bottom and up the sides (bottom of a wooden spoon works well) forming 12 cups. Bake for 12 minutes.
*While the cups are baking. Wisk together the egg yolks, sweetened condensed milk and lemon juice. In a separate bowl, wisk together the raspberry jam and the 1 TBSP raspberry liqueur.
*Remove cookie cups from oven and immediately reshape the mini pie shells (again, the bottom of a wooden spoon works best). Place approximately 1 TBSP of the jam mixture into each. Pour the condensed milk mixture over the tops and return to oven.
*Bake for 10 minutes. Remove from oven and allow to sit on counter for 15 minutes. Place the pan in the fridge. Remove the pies from the pan once completely cool. Help release them by gently running a knife along the edges before trying to lift out. Be careful not to pierce the crusts.
*Store in the fridge.
*When ready to serve, beat heavy cream until it just starts to thicken. Beat in the powdered sugar, lemon extract and Limoncello until stiff peaks form. Spoon or pipe onto the mini pies.

Friday, November 21, 2014

Fly on the Wall, November 2014

Welcome to a Fly on the Wall group post. Today 15 bloggers are inviting you to catch a glimpse of what you’d see if you were a fly on the wall in our homes. Come on in and buzz around my house.

Fly on the Wall | graphic designed by and property of | #MyGraphics

I had a busy day in the kitchen doing a lot of baking and spent most of the day  concentrating on what I was trying to accomplish.

I finished up, took a break and later when I went to make dinner, I couldn’t find the non-stick spray. I knew I had used it that afternoon.

I looked in the obvious places where things seem to frequently magically end up. You know, like the freezer and the trash compactor. Nope. Couldn’t find it.

The next morning I was going to clean my counters and reached under the sink to grab my antibacterial cleaner. Without really looking, I ended up spraying my counters with non-stick spray. Ah, that’s where it went.

Fly on the Wall, a multi-blogger writing challenge | developed and run by | #MyGraphics

Last month I drove PurDude’s car out to him. He went off to college without it, Freshmen aren’t allowed to have them so he didn’t have a choice. But somehow he managed to be one of the Freshman winners of the ability to have (pay for) a parking spot (whatever was left over after the upperclassmen all got theirs).
Before taking the car to him, we had a recall taken care of and had 2 different places check it out for safety. The car needed a few parts.
When I went to pick it up at the mechanic’s, he handed me the rusted out coil that had to be replaced.

car coil paperweight | picture taken by and property of

Explaining why I now have a $700 paperweight/paperclip on my desk. Can I repurpose or what?

Fly on the Wall, a multi-blogger writing challenge | developed and run by | #MyGraphics

Before I even tell you this story, let me say that we have 4 bathrooms in this house, one on each of the bottom two levels and 2 on the top floor. All are regularly equipped with toilet paper.
OK, from the “never put your cell on speaker in public no matter how busy you are” files:
My cell rings while I’m in the grocery store and I make the supreme mistake of answering it, even knowing that it’s one of my kids.
College Boy: Mom, I was in the basement and there was no toilet paper down there so I ran up to the kitchen and grabbed some paper towels. They clogged up the toilet. I’m on my way to school, when you get home can you get the plunger and take care of that basement toilet?
{{at which point we mysteriously got disconnected}}

Fly on the Wall, a multi-blogger writing challenge | developed and run by | #MyGraphics

A lifetime of teaching the boys to plan ahead and not wait until the last minute and it’s come to this:
6:00 am. The house is quiet. When from the door of my room I hear:
College Boy: Mom, can you do me a favor? My laptop isn’t connected to the house printer and I have a paper due today. I emailed it to you so can you just turn on your laptop, check your email for my paper and print it for me? If you can just staple it and put it on the desk in the kitchen I’ll grab it on my way out to school.
So . . . how am I doing at this Mom thing? Winning, right?

Fly on the Wall, a multi-blogger writing challenge | developed and run by | #MyGraphics

Let me start by saying that I am the undisputed Queen of Organization, so this is not like me. Last month I desperately needed a haircut. I couldn’t get an appointment at a salon and was going away for a week the next day. I went into one of those fast-food type haircut places that have sprouted up on every street corner. I mean, how hard can it be, I needed about 6 inches chopped off, not like it’s nuclear science or anything.
It cost $15. Not a good sign.

So . . . uneven layers and had to re-cut the bangs myself. Yup, pay $15 for a haircut and what do you get? A $15 haircut. I would have been better off at a barber . . . or a butcher . . . or a nuclear scientist.

Butterfingers Popcorn | | #recipe

Butterfingers Popcorn | | #recipe

Butterfingers Popcorn

One day I was doing some work on my laptop when I noticed that I had two twitter notifications. This is what I saw:

Twitter followers | picture property of

Not sure how they found me or what made them follow me. It must mean something, but I’m at a loss.

Fly on the Wall, a multi-blogger writing challenge | developed and run by | #MyGraphics

Everyone walks around with a big avocado in their purse, right?

Avocado | picture taken by and property of

While at Purdue, Hubs had to learn to use his new car’s GPS, we were giving our old one, which we’d gotten used to, to PurDude. I don’t know who pissed this system off but she is angry. With our old GPS, if you miss a turn it recalculates. This one gets mad at us. First we get the silent treatment, it won’t talk at all. Then finally it punishes us, taking us miles out of our way. We were in West Lafayette going to the school which is 2 miles away, also in West Lafayette. We missed a turn and the damn thing took us over the river and into Lafayette for like 4 miles, then had us take a right and another right and drive 4 miles back on a road running parallel to the one it just took us down.
Hubs says we need to name the system. I suggested “Bitch”.

Fly on the Wall, a multi-blogger writing challenge | developed and run by | #MyGraphics

And the soda machine at the hotel wasn’t any better. At night I’d want a drink to take to the room with me, so we’d visit the soda machine. The first night I sent Hubs and told him to just get anything diet. He came back with a Mountain Dew and insisted it was the soda machine’s fault. Yuck.
The second night I went myself. Put money into the machine, the only diet was Pepsi so I pressed it. Out came a Mountain Dew Voltage. Never tried one but apparently that machine just gives you whatever it wants.
Text to son: Mountain Dew Voltage tastes like cough medicine.
Fly on the Wall, a multi-blogger writing challenge | developed and run by | #MyGraphics

While visiting him, we took PurDude clothes shopping. He bought a bunch of new clothes including 2 ties. While he’s a pledge, he has to go to dinner at the Frat every Friday night and has to wear a tie.
Driving from the department store to a discount store my son put on one of his new ties. Later that night when we went to dinner, he had taken the tie off. So apparently you wear a tie to a discount store on a Sunday afternoon, but take it off for a Sunday dinner out.
So I guess I learned a little something about style while at college last month.

Now click on the links below for a peek into some other homes:

Baking In A Tornado signature | | #MyGraphics

Butterfingers Popcorn
Printable Recipe
2 bags of microwave popcorn, popped (about 16 cups popped)
1 stick butter
1 1/2 cup brown sugar
2 TBSP baking cocoa
5 (1.9 oz) Butterfingers bars
1/2 tsp baking soda
*Crush the butterfingers bars in a food processor. Measure 2/3 cup of the candy crumbs and set aside.
*Preheat oven to 250 degrees.  Grease 2 baking sheets. I use the disposable ones.
*Divide the popcorn amongst the baking sheets. Remove unpopped kernels. Put into oven to keep the popcorn warm while making the topping.
*In a heavy medium sized pan at medium heat melt the butter, add the brown sugar and cocoa. Stir and bring to a boil. Allow to boil for one minute.
*Remove from heat and stir in the baking soda. Last, quickly mix what’s left of the crushed candy.
*Take popcorn from oven and dollop the candy mixture over all the popcorn. Mix it as best you can on each baking sheet, spread the popcorn evenly over the sheet and return to oven. Bake for 15 minutes.
*Remove from oven and stir, moving the candy mixture from the bottom of the pans onto the top of the popcorn again.
*Return to oven, cook 15 minutes, stir, return to oven cook 15 minutes, stir etc. until you’ve done this 4 times and it’s been in the oven an hour total.
*Mix one last time, sprinkle with remaining 2/3 cup candy, cool on the counter.