When you’re done, click on the links below for a peek into some other homes:
Baking In A Tornado
Sanity Waiting to Happen
My Brain on Kids
Stacy Sews and Schools
Just a Little Nutty
IBD, Daddy and me!
The Rowdy Baker
The Sadder But Wiser Girl
We always try to have family meals. When the kids were babies and went to bed early, I’d get them up and dressed in the morning for a family breakfast,. Once we were all able to eat at the same time in the evening, we switched to family dinners like most people do. I’m here to tell you that family dinner isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. Both boys didn’t like dinners in general and mine specifically.
Fast forward to the teen years. Phew, now we can all sit like adults and have a pleasant dinner, right? Not so much. For one thing, the boys have been consistent in their criticism of my dinner choices and of my cooking and now of me in general. In order to have a conflict free dinner, I started reading the paper and watching the news for funny stories to use as neutral (non-Mom-critical) topics for dinner conversations. If anyone wants to try this, local news is best for absurd stories.
*Flasher rings doorbells. Watch out, they’ve found their way out of the parks. Great, if your baby is sick, Doctors no longer make house call. But the Wee Willy Wonkers do. The flasher, last name of Snotty (what chance did this guy have, really?) was ultimately caught by a bartender (be sure to tip your bartenders, folks). Police are not releasing the offender’s picture. Probably cause they don’t have one above the waist. You can’t make this stuff up.
*Kids found $20 on the street and turned it in to the police. This is supposed to be a sweet story about children learning honesty but really, are you kidding me? I understand turning in someone’s found personal property, but who’s going to end up with that $20 bill? It probably cost those kids’ parents more than $20 in gas to drive to the police station to turn it in. If my kids were to find $20 on the street, I’d tell them to keep it. Well, most of it. 60%/40%, and I’m the adult.
*A man is suing his county, village, fire department, and many elected officials for negligence after he was hurt in a pre-planned controlled burn ignited in a field. He says authorities failed to spot him lying in a nearby field when they started the fire on a “dangerously windy day”. I know it’s not funny that he was hurt, but by the time we stopped laughing at this particular genius, dinner was over.
*If you want your skin to look younger, there’s a new thing called slap therapy. You voluntarily go in and sit there as your therapist slaps you in the face over and over again. AND you get to pay $1000.00 for the privilege. I want to know how you get a job as a Slap Therapist, and if you get to go out and pick your own clients. I’d even go door to door. Cause there are a few women I can think of . . .
*The annual Frozen Turkey Bowling Event is on! For a $5 donation you can roll a turkey for a single frame at each of 7 participating bars. I have so many questions: Was someone drunk when they thought this up? Do you bring your own turkey? Do you have to pick that thing up and walk with it from bar to bar? If you’re bowling in a bar not a bowling alley, what are you aiming for, customers on stools?
*A Sound-Off section of the newspaper allows people to write in about things that bother them. One woman wrote in complaining that adjusters to her bra straps are in the back. She went on to explain that she can’t reach them while the bra is on and it’s hard to adjust correctly when the bra is off. Silly me, wasting my time worrying about health, war, the economy . . .
So I’m sure I’ve pretty much talked everyone in the planet out of ever coming to my house for dinner. Your loss, we're having Chinese food and I made Crab Pockets as an appetizer. Everyone here loves Crab Pockets.
18 wonton wrappers
5 ounces canned white crabmeat
4 ounces cream cheese, softened
1/4 cup mayonnaise
3 green onions, thinly sliced
1/2 stick butter, melted
Opt: Sweet and Sour Sauce for serving
*Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
*Mash together the cream cheese and mayonnaise until well mixed.
*Mix in the crabmeat, then the green onions.
*Put a little bit of water into a bowl.
*Brush a cookie sheet with some of the melted butter.
*Lay out half of the wontons (keep the rest covered so they don't dry out).
*Put a spoonful of the crab mixture into the center of each wonton.
*Dip your finger into the water and wet all the edges around the entire square of the wonton, this will help them to stick shut.
*Fold the wonton like a triangle and pinch both open sides so that they stay shut and all of the filling is sealed inside.
*Lay the wontons onto the prepared cookie sheet. They should not be touching each other.
*Prepare the rest of the wontons the same way.
*Brush the tops of the wontons with the rest of the melted butter.
*Bake for approx. 7 minutes, turn and bake approx. another 7 minutes or until the edges start to turn golden brown.
* Opt: serve with Sweet and Sour Sauce.