Tuesday, February 12, 2019

The Broken Toe (Black and) Blues

I broke my baby toe. Again. 

I'd like to say that doing it once is enough to instill caution but, sadly, after that initial trauma, and even after the second, I reverted right back to walking around with abandon.

The first time I broke my baby toe was when my kids were really young, like around 3 and 4 maybe. Let me tell you that it's best to do these things when your loving family is around to support you. Or not. I had been about to get the kids some juice when it happened. I fell to the kitchen floor holding my foot, writhing around with tears in my eyes saying "ouch, ouch, ouch" over and over. My younger son, oblivious as usual, just went about his business. My older son stood over me demanding his juice {{sigh}}.

This time, just to add a little more drama (read: trauma) to the whole experience, when I caught that baby toe on the bed post trying a little too enthusiastically to get to the coffee pot that particular morning, I heard it crack. Let me tell you, it's been weeks and I still sometimes hear that crack in my sleep. I may need therapy. But then I digress . . .

The first few times I broke a toe (always the baby one for some reason), I ended up in the emergency room. My toe was crooked, and my foot was swollen and red, then black and blue so I thought it should be looked at. Amateur move. Once you've sat in the waiting room for about 100 hours, they take you back, treat you to doctors and x-rays and all things expensive, hand you a "boot" (which is the moon-boot cousin of the flip flop but with itchy velcro to strap you in for take-off) which requires the utilization of a fork lift to raise your foot to walk, btw. Then they tell you there is nothing that can be done for a broken toe, it'll heal itself. OH, and as a parting gift, a bill that will require you to take out a second mortgage on your house. And yes, that's just the co-pay.

The Broken Toe (Black and) Blues | Graphic designed by and property of www.BakingInATornado.com | #MyGraphics #funny


With all this experience, it's clear that I'm the broken baby toe aficionado, expert, pundit, guru, authority. So here are a few of the "do"s and "don't"s of the broken toe circuit:

First of all, just say "no". Don't do it. For the smallest of appendages that thing sure does know how to get your attention if you anger it. Make friends with your little digit and protect it with all you've got. That means (for those of us who are a little slow on the uptake - meaning me - walk around not into furniture).

If, for reasons beyond your control (go with me here) you do break it, do it in the summer. The logistics of a winter toe break is bleak. Don't think you can go into a store wearing one shoe and one flip flop without people giving you the "she's nuts" look (well, on my son's advice I did take to shopping at Walmart where my, ahem, unique footwear attire didn't even get me an honorable mention). 

One thing I did learn having broken my toe in February this particular time turned out to be a true time saver. If you have to leave the house you can skip the whole step of having to ice it to reduce the swelling. Believe me, just walking outdoors wearing a flip flop ices it plenty.

Speaking of winter, as much as I hate to impart this little nugget of advice, you're going to have to go commando. I know, I know, not what you want to hear, but let me tell you (possibly from experience although I'm not in a position to confirm or deny at this point) if you catch that toe on your panties when getting dressed (no? just me?), they're gonna have to peel you off the ceiling.


Keeping up your strength is important so eat lots of sweets. Yeah, I know, it's my answer to everything but it helps. Pinky (not baby toe) swear.


Butterscotch White Chocolate Chip Crinkles, boxed ingredients come together in minutes to make these butterscotch cookies studded with sweet white chocolate chips. | Recipe developed by www.BakingInATornado.com | #recipe #cookies

Butterscotch White Chocolate Chip Crinkles


Whatever you do, carpe the diem out of that thing. So far, in the first few days I was unable to do the laundry ("I can't put weight on it while transferring clothes from the washer to the dryer"), do the dishes ("but it swells when I stand that long"), change the toilet paper roll ("you want me to walk all the way to the hall closet?"), go downstairs to put the leftovers in the freezer ("do you really want to take the chance that I'll fall and break the rest of my toes?"), and bought a new pair of shoes online ("to make me feel better and give me something to look forward to").

Last piece of advice: make up a good story. "I caught my toe on a piece of furniture" is just so overdone. Well, in my house anyway.



Baking In A Tornado signature | www.BakingInATornado.com | #MyGraphics





Butterscotch White Chocolate Crinkles        
                                    ©www.BakingInATornado.com

Printable Recipe

Ingredients (makes about 40):
1box yellow cake mix
1 box instant butterscotch pudding mix
1 egg
8 oz cool whip, defrosted
1 cup white chocolate chips
1 cup powdered sugar

Directions:
*Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Cover baking sheets with parchment paper.
*Mix together cake mix, pudding mix, egg and cool whip. Mix in the white chocolate chips.
*Place the powdered sugar on a plate.
*Drop a heaping teaspoon of the mix at a time into the powdered sugar and roll around to cover completely. 
*Place on the prepared baking sheets and bake for 15 minutes.
*Allow to set on the baking sheet for 2 minutes before removing to cool completely.




14 comments:

  1. You poor thing! I have heard other people talk about breaking toes. It just sounds painful. Hope you can wear your new shoes soon.

    ReplyDelete
  2. A doctor friend of mine says more people break their toes when they're not wearing shoes, especially navigating around the end of their bed. Heal well and soon! Brenda

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I am not at all surprised. Although I have to admit that I could trip over nothing, too.

      Delete
  3. After broken toe #2 I gave up walking around the house without shoes on, but that doesn't help much when you are getting out of bed, I'll admit. Mine were the index (?? the toes next to the big toe) toes on both feet. Neither in the winter, though. Pro tip: do not break toe week before a heavy rainfall, because bailing out your basement of dirty flood water while wearing a flip flop is not highly recommended.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Good point, next time I'm about to break my toe, I'll check the forecast to be sure it's not going to rain!

      Delete
  4. I have never broken my little toe only the toe next to my big toe way back in the late 90's, I did know that toes heal on their own

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That's what they told me both times I saw a doctor and if you think about it, what could they do, put a tiny little cast on it?

      Delete
  5. Done it several times. Also both ankles. Toe was probably the worst and you're right, doing it in February in colder climates is not a good thing. The cookies look wonderful though...

    ReplyDelete
  6. I am right there with you. I lost count of the times I have broken mine. Once my husband (who was walking in FRONT of me at the time) stepped backwards, stepped on my toe and broke it. It sounds like you might be suffering from PTSD hearing the crack over and over again. I suggest wine, brandy, or your favorite mixed drink while you ring the bell for service. Here’s to fast healing!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, I like the way you think. Wine, Brandy AND my favorite mixed drink!

      Delete
  7. My toes are all in one piece (thank goodness)! It's a good thing, because I'm a lousy invalid.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah, I'm not the best invalid myself. Unfortunately, at this point, I don't have much choice.

      Delete

Warning: Comment at your own risk. I have Comment Moderation, meaning I approve all comments before they show up here. So go ahead, I'm not scared!