SOS. Or Not: Fly on the Wall

Welcome to a monthly Fly on the Wall group post. Today 4 bloggers are inviting you to catch a glimpse of what you’d see if you were a fly on the wall in our homes. Come on in and buzz around my house. At the end of my post you’ll find links to this month’s other participants’ posts.

PurDude had called and I love hearing from him about what's been going on both at work and, before the virus hit, on the ski slopes. It's always so hard to hang up at the end of a conversation.

I've mentioned a time or two before that we're complete opposites when it comes to communication. He's a man of few words, texts and PMs usually limited to two or three. I, on the other hand, am that person who makes a short story long.

As we were hanging up, PurDude mentioned that he thought there was something else he wanted to say but couldn't remember what.

Me: Well, you know you can always PM or text me when you remember.
PurDude: Yeah.
Me: It doesn't take more than a minute for you to send me a text.
PurDude: Yeah. 
Me: So here's how it'll go, you'll send me your normal 3 word text. I'll respond with my normal 7 paragraph answer, you'll acknowledge with another 2 to 3 words and I'll respond with another 7 paragraphs.

Made him laugh. And that's exactly how I want a conversation with him to end.

 

I'm so glad that PurDude had some really fun times before social distancing became necessary. He's a great kid, but he can be very stubborn. He had friends coming out to visit, one for 5 days, then a couple of days later 2 more friends were coming in for 5 days. I talked to him on 3 different occasions about having a little food in the house when his friends came. He doesn't have to serve them meals (he couldn't, he doesn't cook . . . at all) just a few snacks for at night and some orange juice, English muffins, butter and peanut butter from the morning. His friends were flying in from far away and I wanted him to be a good host.

The day before the first visit I was talking to him on the phone and I was frustrated because he hadn't listened to me at all, hadn't bought anything for his guests. As we were hanging up:

Me: Love you.
PurDude: Love you more.
Me: Well I love you more . . . than a toothache.

Hubs' first day of working from home was also the day that Passover would start at dinner. College Boy and I were making an effort to be quiet as much as possible as he was working in the office and taking client calls.

At one point in the afternoon I could hear him finish a call and I had just set the table for the Passover Seder.

Me: I think I'm going to open this wine now.

Hubs comes in from the other room and grabs a glass.

Me: You can't have any, you're at work.
Hubs (laughing): I can take a break and take a sip.
Me: No, no drinking on the job. And if you're lucky, I won't finish the bottle before you start your commute home.

I happen to have very good hearing, so I heard him mumbling under his breath as he walked away. Something about there being more bottles of wine where that came from.

The boys grew up basically grabbing whatever I had baked while I was moving it from the oven to the counter to cool. But some desserts really need to cool first, especially those that need to set before cutting, like my Strawberries and Cream Bars. 

Strawberries and Cream Bars 

I had taken them from the oven and they were on the counter coming down to room temperature before I could refrigerate to cool completely before cutting. Which was the point at which College Boy stopped by.

College Boy: I'm starving and those smell great, I'll try them for you.
Me: No, not yet. They have cream cheese in the center layer, they need to cool before I cut them.
College Boy: I think you just hate me.
Me: It's definitely a possibility.

Hubs and PurDude are both considered essential, so they can go into the office. PurDude is working remotely and has been for a while. Hubs only has 10 to 15 people in his office, so, last month, they continued to work at the office but is not any more. The next group of snippets is from the time when he was still going into the office:

He had gone to work and I was just waking up and heading down to the kitchen. I had a bunch of things I needed to take down and if you're anything like me, you're determined to take it all down in one trip.

I had, in my right arm, my laptop and I was balancing my cell phone on top of it. So the phone didn't fall off, I held it up against my chest. As I headed down the stairs, I thought I heard something and realized that there was a voice coming from . . . well . . . my chest.

Which is how I found myself in the position of having to explain to my husband that I wasn't calling him, I had actually boob dialed him.

I've talked a lot before about Hubs being unable to do an errand without calling me 6 times. I've also mentioned a time or two that as technically challenged as I am, he's double. Since he was going to the office anyway, he would be the one to go to the store when we needed essentials.

So it should surprise no one that when he was doing an errand on the way home from work, he called. This time from his car, before he even got in the store.

I answered his question, we hung up and my phone immediately rang again. His number again {{sigh}}.

Me: Hello.
Hubs: Hello.
Me: What's up?
Hubs: Nothing. Did you call me or did I call you?
Me: You called me.
Hubs: Hmm. OK. Never mind.

 

He made it home and brought in what he had bought.

Me: How was your day?
Hubs: Good. I got lucky.
Me: Don't tell me that right now, I don't think the divorce lawyers are available for consultation these days.
Hubs: I meant that I found toilet paper.

 

I've also spoken before (sadly, many times) about Hubs and electronics. He's so bad at using his cell phone that even I know more than he does.

Just before he stopped working, I was sitting at home at about 5:00 pm when I got, in rapid succession, 3 texts from him.

The first was a picture:

Looks like an elevator. And it looks like the picture was taken from the floor?

Then came:

SOS? With his location? I started to panic.

Immediately followed by this one:

He needs help. Police? Ambulance? My heart beating out of my chest, I called his cell phone hoping he'd be able to answer.

Hubs: Hello.
Me: You answered. Are you OK? What's wrong?
Hubs: What do you mean? Nothing's wrong, I'm fine. Why?

OMG, seriously. There should be licensing for owning a cell phone. And that man should be barred for life. 

Twice a week Hubs would work late and I'd leave him a plate of leftovers from earlier in the week for dinner. He'd come in the house, put his plate in the microwave for a minute or so, go up to change his clothes, then come back down to see how much longer he had to microwave his dinner for.

One night, what turned out to be the last week he worked, I'm in the den when he comes down from changing and his dinner is cooking in the microwave.

Hubs: Why did you put my dinner in for 15 minutes?
Me: Me? I'm sitting here minding my own business.
Hubs: Well I wouldn't put it in there for 15 minutes.
Me: But I would?

Hubs and I are quite the pair.

Also when he was still working, I would set up the coffee maker in the morning to go off when he gets out of the shower. He took coffee in his travel mug, and I'd drink the other few cups when I got up. Well, that's how it usually worked. That's how it was supposed to work.

Hubs comes home from work:

Me: We both screwed up with the coffee this morning.
Hubs: I kept trying to get it to work, shut it off, turned it on, checked to be sure there was coffee in there.
Me: I screwed up, there was coffee, I forgot to add the water.
Hubs: I didn't think to look for the water.
Me: But you screwed up too, you left it on and the carafe sat empty on that hot plate for an hour until I got up.
Hubs: Oh, I didn't mean to leave it on.
Me: Yeah, I didn't mean to leave out the water.

Q: How many Blessings does it take to make coffee?
A: Apparently more than two.

Now click on the links below for a peek into some other homes:

Never Ever Give Up Hope  
Menopausal Mother 
Spatulas on Parade 
Go Mama O. 

Strawberries and Cream Bars

                                                         ©www.BakingInATornado.com

Printable Recipe

Ingredients:
1 stick butter, room temperature
1 stick margarine, room temperature
1/2 cup sugar
1/2 cup brown sugar
1 egg
1 tsp strawberry extract
2 TBSP Bailey's Strawberries and Cream
OPT: 2 drops red food coloring
1 tsp baking powder
2 3/4 cups flour

2 (8oz) packages of cream cheese, room temperature
1/2 cup brown sugar
1 TBSP powdered sugar
2 eggs
2 TBSP Bailey's Strawberries and Cream
1/2 cup chopped strawberries

Directions:
*Preheat oven to 325 degrees. Grease a 9 X 13 pan.
*Cream together the butter, margarine, sugar and 1/2 cup brown sugar. Beat in 1 egg, the strawberry extract, 2 TBSP Bailey's Strawberries and Cream and food coloring (if using). Stir in the baking powder and flour.
*Pat about 2/3 of this dough into the bottom of the baking pan. Bake for 10 minutes. Allow to cool.
*Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
*Beat the cream cheese, the remaining brown sugar and the powdered sugar. Beat in the remaining eggs, the remaining liqueur, then mix in the chopped strawberries.
*Pour over the bottom cookie layer and spread out evenly. Roll the remaining dough into balls, flatten between your palms and place onto the cream cheese layer.
*Bake for about 35 minutes or until the center is set.
*Cool to room temperature, then refrigerate to cool completely before slicing. Store in the refrigerator and bring just to room temperature to serve.