Use Your Words: Beer and Martinis

Today’s post is a monthly writing challenge. If you’re new here, this is how it works: participating bloggers picked 4 – 6 words or short phrases for someone else to craft into a post. All words must be used at least once. All of the posts will be unique as each writer has received their own set of words. That’s the challenge, here’s a fun twist; no one who’s participating knows who got their words and in what direction the recipient will take them. Until now.

At the end of this post you’ll find links to the other blogs featuring this challenge. Check them all out, see what words they got and how they used them.
I’m using: Father's Day ~ beer ~ teddy bear ~ transportation ~ career ~ barber

They were submitted by: Spatulas on Parade.

I'm guessing I'm not taking anyone by surprise by saying that Father's Day is right around the corner. It'll be my first without my dad.

It's funny, I've been 1500 miles away from my family for so long now that Father's Day has been about my kids' dad for many, many years. So it's not that I've been physically with my dad for these celebrations lately, it's just that my dad has been physically celebrating and celebrated. This year we'll honor Hubs as usual, but there will be a sense of melancholy too.

My dad wasn't much of a beer drinker. He went for Martinis. Rather than showing up with a case of beer, I'd often buy him Vermouth for Father's Day. I think the martini kind of fit him. He was not just a CPA, but through his career had gotten his Masters in Taxation, had started and run his own firm. He wasn't someone you sat down, had a beer and watched sports with. He was a martini guy.

Now Hubs, he's a guy you have a beer with while screaming at the Red Sox on TV. 

Different guys, yet in many ways alike. Both intelligent, dedicated, hard workers. Both dependable and honest. And both teddy bears.

Then with Dad and now with Hubs, there'll be no transportation required on Father's Day. Home cook outs are the way to go. And no need for him to shave, no trips to the barber. Casual and comfortable was and will be the order of the day. My stepmother used to grill us steaks. This year Hubs has requested Marinated Grilled Ham Steaks. I'm making another favorite, Mashed Potato Casserole (recipe coming next week). Dessert is a Father's Day tradition around here, Ice Cream Sandwich Cake.

Marinated Grilled Ham Steak

(going onto the grill)

So we'll have a casual, comfortable cook out again this year on Father's Day. My husband and sons will have a beer together. I'll be there too, of course. Yelling at the Red Sox on TV. And drinking a Martini.

Here are links to all the other Use Your Words posts:

Southern Belle Charm 
 Not That Sarah Michelle
Spatulas on Parade 
The Diary of an Alzheimer's Caregiver 
Dinosaur Superhero Mommy 
My Brain on Kids 
The Bergham Chronicles 
The Angrivated Mom  
Confessions of a part time working mom 
Climaxed 

Marinated Grilled Ham Steak

                                                                          ©www.BakingInATornado.com

Printable Recipe

Ingredients:
1 fully cooked ham steak (boneless or bone in)
2 TBSP brown sugar
2 TBSP maple syrup
1 TBSP stone ground mustard
1 TBSP vinegar
1 TBSP orange juice
1 TBSP water

Directions:
*On a plate with a lip, mix the brown sugar, maple syrup, mustard, vinegar, orange juice and water. 
*Place the ham steak in the marinade, then flip over so both sides have the marinade on them. Place a piece of wax paper over it and refrigerate for 2 hours to all day, turning the ham steak over now and then.
*Spray your cold grill grates with nonstick spray. Heat the grill to medium.
*Place the ham steak on the grill. Do not discard the marinade on the plate. Grill for 3 to 4 minutes. You are just heating the ham as it's already cooked.
*Flip the ham and cook the other side for 3 to 4 minutes. Remove the ham to the plate with the marinade still on it. Cut and serve. 

Raising Future Dads: It’s A Boy

Stunned silence. It filled the room as only silence can. I lay there on that comfortable-as-burning-coals table, goop on my belly, ultrasound wand moving quickly away, everyone in that room taking a step away from me, as if it were choreographed.

I was pregnant again. It’s hard to say how many times I’d been pregnant before. IVF, cycle after vicious cycle, and pregnant every time. The first baby stopped developing. Second, a chemical pregnancy, not viable was all that mattered. Then twins and, after emergency surgery in the middle of the night with tornado sirens sounding and my husband out of town, a tube removal and two became one. But I had that one, my beautiful first child, a son.

Now, lying on this table in the first trimester of another pregnancy, I caught my first glimpse of my daughter. Followed by the aforementioned silence and stepping away routine.
“Go back” I demanded, breaking the silence.
“It’s not going to go away” the doctor calmly answered.
“But it looked like my daughter had a penis.”
“Congratulations, you’re having another boy.”

I never would have imagined it. I come from a family of girls. The first chapter played out in a house full of women: my mom, my sister and I. I was equipped to raise daughters.

And then I had a son.

This one was supposed to be my daughter, everyone knew that. Visions of dresses and pink bows being shot down by cargo-pants-wearing, water-gun-toting boys. Sexist, I know, but I’m a product of my generation and that’s how my mind processed the information. So the next chapter of my life would be inhabited by men. Karma. Of epic proportions.

Don’t get me wrong, I adore my boys. Always have (after the shock wore off). But raising boys? In this day and age? I really wasn’t sure I was up to the challenge.

Love them: I could handle that.
Nurture them:  got it covered.
Teach them right from wrong: no different from what I’d teach girls.
Morals and values: same.
How to be good MEN, future husbands and fathers: Ummm.

We all want our children to be strong and independent, to be productive, contributing members of society. But that means different things when raising boys as opposed to raising girls. It has to. The history of expectations associated with being one sex or the other dictates it. The ever-changing roles in current society require it.

I wouldn’t be doing this alone. But my husband worked long hours, traveled a week every month and we live 1500 miles away from ALL of our family. Those boys would spend the preponderance of their waking hours with me. Fact.

From the time the boys came home from the hospital I got them up in the morning and into the kitchen for breakfast with Dad. They’d be asleep when he got home from work so family breakfast it would be. I still picture them, during the school years, sitting in a row at the kitchen counter eating breakfast together every morning.

 Chocolate Ice Cream Cake

 

When the boys got a little older, I started mowing the lawn. I wanted the boys to see that no jobs should be strictly “boy jobs” or “girl jobs”. But this was also about Dad time. I was cognizant of the fact that he was not just their dad but their primary male role model. In the warmer months my husband would come home from work, eat dinner and have to mow the lawn. If I mowed he could do bath time, splashes and soaked floor and giggles and all.

I’d love to tell you that there’s a magic bullet. It would be great to say that it was easy. But same sex or not, my boys are as different as two people get. What gets through to one escapes the other. They have temperaments and challenges and . . . well . . . personalities. I can tell you that I tried. Not just to teach them right from wrong, impart morals and values, but to show them what sympathy and empathy looks like; about serving their community, their family. But, as with most kids, a lot of that was accomplished because it was required and consequences were being avoided. Will those lessons stand?

My boys are teenagers now, both in college. Did I do my job? You’d think I could answer that but no such luck. You did read that word “teenagers”, right?

I look back and see all of my mistakes. I look at the present and see . . . well . . . teenagers. What will the future hold? All I can tell you is this: the potential is there. If they want to be good men, supportive spouses, present as fathers, they’re equipped.

So here I sit holding my breath. With my fingers crossed . . . and possibly my toes.
 

 

 

This post previously published as a Guest Post on Dads Round Table.

Chocolate Ice Cream Cake

                                             ©www.BakingInATornado.com
 
Printable Recipe
 
Ingredients, Crust:
3/4 stick butter, melted
½ cup + 1/3 cup flour
1/2 cup sugar
2 TBSP baking cocoa
1 10 oz package chocolate shortbread cookies, crushed in a Food Processor
 
Cake:
1/2 stick butter, softened
1/2 cup sugar
2 eggs
3/4 cup flour
1/2 tsp baking soda
1 cup chocolate syrup
1/2 tsp vanilla
 
Ice Cream Layers:
1 1/2 quarts (6 cups) chocolate ice cream
½ cup of Toffee bits
Reserved 3/4 cup cookie crumbs
 
Whipped Cream:
½ cup heavy cream
2TBSP powdered sugar
½ tsp vanilla
 
Directions:
*Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Grease a 9 inch springform pan.
*Set aside 3/4 cup of the crushed cookie crumbs.
*Mix melted butter, flour, sugar cocoa and the rest of the cookie crumbs until well blended. Your mixture will be dry and crumbly.
*Press this crust mixture firmly into the bottom and half way up the sides of your prepared springform pan.
*Bake for 10 minutes. Allow to cool completely.
*Grease and flour an 8 inch round cake pan.
*Beat softened butter, sugar eggs and vanilla until smooth.
*Mix in 1/2 cup of flour, then half of the chocolate syrup.
*Mix in the rest of the flour and the baking soda, then the rest of the chocolate syrup.
*Spread batter evenly into cake pan and bake for approximately 30 - 35 minutes or until the center springs back to the touch.
*Cool for 10 minutes in the pan, then remove to cool completely.
*Divide the ice cream into 2 bowls. Allow to start to come to room temperature, just enough to mix in ingredients but do not melt completely.
*Mix the toffee bits into one bowl of ice cream. Place in freezer.
*Mix the reserved cookie crumbs into the other bowl of ice cream. Carefully spread over the cooled crust. Top with the cooled cake layer, press down very gently and freeze for about one hour or until firm.
*After about 45 minutes, remove the second bowl of ice cream from the freezer and allow to come just to spreading consistency.
*Carefully spread this ice cream layer over the cake layer and return to the freezer until hard.
*Beat the heavy cream until soft peaks form. Add the sugar and vanilla and continue to beat until stiff peaks form. Cover the top of the cake with the whipped cream. Decorate as desired. Return to freezer.
*Store cake in freezer. When ready to serve, allow to come to room temperature for a bit (or the crust will be too hard), remove sides of springform pan and slice.

Father's Day Math

Father’s Day  –  the kids   =   ?

 

Last Sunday was Father’s Day.  After all these years, I’d gotten used to celebrating Father’s day without my Father (who lives halfway across the country).  For the past 17 years I’ve been planning Father’s Day as a celebration for my kids and THEIR father. What this means is that I do all the planning, shopping, cooking and baking and my kids hand their Dad the card I bought for him from them (but in the spirit of participation, that they DID sign).

 

This year though, both kids were working.

 

But that’s no reason why I couldn’t make this equation balance, it’s just more of a challenge, build-up required.  It started on Wednesday when I made some Homemade Hot Fudge for the ice cream cake I’d be making for Father’s Day.  I decided to surprise the boys with a mint chocolate chip hot fudge sundae for lunch (note to those who are health conscious: no bacon in mine so mine’s way healthier than BK’s).  Doesn’t make me a good Mom, but it sure made me a popular one!

See, no bacon!

 

Thursday morning when the kids left for summer school, I was in the kitchen whipping the cream for the ice cream cake.  Didn’t say anything, didn’t plan any special lunch, just standing there in my nightgown with my eyes half shut and my pony-tail off kilter whipping the cream.  Not pretty, but a good subtle point was made:  This cake is going to have whipped cream too!
 
Next came the Ice Cream Cake itself.  Friday morning was for assembly, and setting the hook.  If by some miracle any men out there are reading this, yes, I’m making an analogy between baking (well, really parenting) and fishing.  We are talking about Father’s Day after all.
 
Now all that was left was to reel them in.  I scheduled dessert for a time when I knew both kids would be home from work on Sunday night.  I knew I had ‘em.  Now the equation is looking something like this:
 

Ice cream cake  +  whipped cream  +  hot fudge  =  Father’s Day  +  the kids

 

Ice Cream Sandwich Cake

I think I deserve an “A”.

Ice Cream Sandwich Cake
                                  ©www.BakingInATornado.com

NOTE: Click here for Homemade Hot Fudge recipe: Ode to a Reader

Printable Recipe

 

Ingredients:
1 1/2 cups heavy cream
3 TBSP confectioner's sugar
12 ice cream sandwiches
Hot fudge sauce, warm to just spreadable (I make my own, but you can buy it)
chopped butterfingers candies
 
Directions:
*Line a 8 X 11 inch pan with plastic wrap, allowing the wrap to hang over the sides.
*Beat heavy cream with confectioner's sugar until stiff peaks form.
*Put 6 ice cream sandwiches into bottom of pan, touching each other any way they will fit. You may need to cut some and put them along the sides of the whole sandwiches depending on the size and shape of your pan.
*Spread a thin layer of fudge over the sandwiches, then sprinkle with some of the butterfingers.
*Spread about 1/3 of the whipped cream  over the top.
*Repeat all layers ending with whipped cream/
*Use remainder of whipped cream to frost front, back and sides.
*Drizzle remainder of fudge sauce over the top.
*Freeze until hardened, then gently cover with plastic wrap.
*Keep frozen until serving.