Listen to Your Mama, Lessons from the Shingles

It's not much of a secret that I had the "S" word all of October and continue to suffer. I'm talking about Shingles. Although I have heard of worse places to have them, mine were pretty bad. The sore was on my right upper back, but the lymph nodes under that armpit were swollen and most of the itching and pain was in my right breast. So if you have a nanny cam in my house, or are one of those hackers able to spy via the laptop camera and you've seen me for 6 weeks sitting on the couch holding my breast with my eyes closed while moaning, let me just state for the record that it's not what you think. 

Anyway, there are some things I learned from having survived spending so much time in the jaws of hell, and since I'm feeling up to it, I thought I'd share them with you. Some are positive lessons, others I feel lucky to have survived.

Like: 

~ "Ouch" and "pain" are four letter words.
 
~ Someone needs to contact the Merriam-Webster people, Shingles needs it's own dictionary. Because "ouch" and "pain". though 4 letter words, just don't cut it. Now "agony", "excruciating", "torturous", those words are at least in the ballpark.



~ Multiply time by a factor of ten to interpret human time into "shingles" time. So if they say your pain meds will work in 1/2 hour, that's 5 hours in shingles time. And if they say the duration of the disease is 3 to 5 weeks, that's like 30 to 50 weeks forever in shingles time.


~ I probably should have lead with this, the hardest learned lesson: doesn't matter how old you are, listen to your mama, dammit. 
 

~ Pain meds do double duty. Not only do they block some of the pain for a little while, but they allow you to sit in the house and not give a damn that there are dirty dishes in the sink and the laundry's not done. No wonder they're addictive.

~ Between the pain, the fever, the inability to wear certain clothes, your being contagious, and your fuzziness from the meds, you're pretty much stuck in the house. So you get to not wear a bra. For days. And if you were capable of smiling (ever again), you would.

~ You don't care what's for dinner. You don't even care if there's any dinner.

~ While we're on the subject of food, and this lesson was probably the hardest of all, because I've believed, really believed, for my whole life, but it turns out that chocolate does not make everything better. {{sob}}. 

~ Once you go off all of the pain meds, turns out a bit of whiskey and bourbon can do what chocolate cannot. Who knew? Well, besides me. 

Spiked Hot Cider

~ There were lots of lessons mama taught you, but one (that I, anyway) missed out on is when you can't pick your arm up, and you can't put your arm down what you do with it.

~ When you can't lay on your back, can't lay on your front, can't lay on your side and fall over when you attempting to sleep standing up, don't try standing on your head. Turns out desperation is not the mother of invention. Inevitably that just won't go well. And "ouch" doesn't cover it.

~ While we're on the subject, sleeping on the toilet doesn't work out either.

~ You will forget everything: what you're thinking, what you're doing, what you need, when you took your meds, what time of day it is, everything. Except the pain. You will never forget the pain.

~ It hurts to yell. And you should have known that before you sat down to watch football. If it hurts to talk, you damn well should have figured out that it hurts to yell, duh (so much for my reputation as a stable genius).

But:

Thanksgiving is in two days and my son flies in from Boulder tonight. I'll be making a turkey with all the trimmings even if it kills me. We'll have a fire in the fireplace, football on the TV, and I'll be using my new re-found ability to smile. And let me tell you this, I will be thankful for my family, I will be thankful for the food on the table, and most of all I will be thankful for the wisdom of my mom, who I will never EVER be caught not listening to again. Amen.

Spiked Hot Cider        
                                                       ©www.BakingInATornado.com

Printable Recipe

Ingredients (per drink):
8 oz apple cider
1 TBSP caramel syrup
1 oz Jim Beam Apple
1 oz Fireball whiskey
whipped cream 
1 TBSP caramel

Directions:
*NOTE: I make each serving individually in microwave safe mugs, but you can heat the cider in a pan on the stove, and transfer to your mugs.
*Heat the apple cider in a microwave safe mug in the microwave for 2 minutes. 
*Stir in the caramel syrup and both liquors. Top with whipped cream and drizzle with caramel.

Genius Yes, But Stable?: Fly on the Wall

Welcome to a monthly Fly on the Wall group post. Today 4 bloggers are inviting you to catch a glimpse of what you’d see if you were a fly on the wall in our homes. Come on in and buzz around my house. At the end of my post you’ll find links to this month’s other participants’ posts.

I have spoken about the fact that I'm just recovering from a case of Shingles. I even have a post coming up about it, the lessons I learned from it.

While I was in agony, there were many times when I could be found walking around the house holding onto my right breast.

And you know what? Even before they found out that I was sick and what was wrong with me, not one person in this house even blinked at the sight.

The Popeye's Chicken sandwich came back this month. I haven't tried it yet, and probably won't since College Boy told me that the line at the local Popeye's was around the building and down the street. 

PurDude tried them before they ran out the first time Popeye's had them and he absolutely loved them. So once I knew they were back, I sent him a PM.

Me: Did you know the Popeye's chicken sandwich was back?
PurDude: Yeah.
Me: Well, if whenever want to spend more time in a Popeye's line than it takes to get through security at the Denver airport, I want a selfie of you with that sandwich. 
PurDude: No line is longer than security at DIA.
Me: IDK, those Popeye's lines go on forever. And did you hear someone got killed in one of those lines over a fight about cutting the line? Even if they were running out, no sandwich is worth dying over.
PurDude: Before I moved here I actually got the last one in the Popeye's near where I used to live.
Me: I'm glad you lived through it.
PurDude: Yeah, at least until I ate the sandwich.

trump announced in the end of October that he was building a wall along the Colorado, New Mexico border. This, of course, concerned me greatly. I immediately texted my son in Colorado:

Me: Be careful where you drive.
PurDude: Why?
Me: And do you still have your original birth certificate I sent you so you could get your Colorado license?
PuDude: Yeah, why?
Me: trump's building a wall in your state.
PurDude: Why?
Me: He says to keep out the New Mexicans.
PurDude: What?
Me: If you drive too far south you could end up separated from your mom and put in a cage.
PurDude: I don't think you have to worry about it, Mom.
Me: And you won't do well in a cage, they don't have True Religion jeans there, or Polo after shave. Or even toilet paper for that matter.
PurDude: Hey, Mom?
Me: Yeah?
PurDude: You got any of those pain meds left over? Maybe you better take a few, get some rest. I'm worried about you.

I love comments on my posts, most bloggers do. I have some readers who don't comment here but do on my Baking In A Tornado Facebook page. That's fun too. I value your opinions and observations and reply to all of them.

I talk each month in these Fly on the Wall posts about my typos and/or auto correct issues. Sometimes they're funny, but sometimes they get me into trouble. Here's one that happened this month. 

JoAnn had an objection to something I'd written, felt it was not necessary (actually, I think that was the last time I said something about my breast pain). I don't have a problem with these kinds of comments, and I tried to respond to her respectfully. Tried. Seems I called her HoAnn. Ooops, there's one less reader . . . 

I'm flying PurDude home for Thanksgiving next week. After 4 years of having to fly him home from school, I had one year of him being nearby and now I'm back to flying him home again. Don't get me wrong, I can't wait to get my arms around that boy.

I've mentioned before that every time PurDude comes home, College Boy mentions that I only make the best dinners when PurDude is around. He's kinda kidding, but kinda not.

Me: Your brother's coming home on Tuesday.
College Boy: Glad to hear it, you only make all the family favorite foods when he's here.
Me: Not this year, this year I'm making only foods you all hate. 

College Boy sorta looked at me for a minute, in shock I guess, then he started laughing. At least one of the 3 men in my life get me.

Pepper Jelly Glazed Taco Meatloaf

Hubs was heading out one Saturday morning at the end of last month (after the October Fly on the Wall had already posted).

Me: Where are you going?
Hubs: I'm going to rake the leaves in the back yard before I mow one last time.
Me: Rake? Are you kidding? Just mulch them with the lawn mower.
Hubs: I don't think that's good for the lawn.
Me: I've done it many times. 

Hubs goes out, mows the lawn and the leaves and comes in.

Hubs: You're a genius.
Me: I'm a stable genius.
Hubs: Don't push it.

Another story from the end of last month. 

I set the coffee up before I go to sleep. I set the coffee maker to go off, and I put out mugs. For the month of October, I use Halloween mugs that a friend gave us years ago.

I came down one morning to find Hubs drinking his coffee out of the witch mug.

Me: What are you doing?
Hubs: Drinking coffee?
Me: Out of my mug!
Hubs: Does it matter?
Me: Yes it matters, I'm the witch. You're the bat.
Hubs: Seriously? Just drink out of the other mug.
Me: Put. The mug. Down.
Hubs: OK, OK, putting the mug down. 

Hubs grabs the bat mug and is walking out of the kitchen when College Boy walks in.

College Boy: Dad, what are you and mom fighting about?
Hubs: She's the witch.
College Boy: You called her a witch?
Hubs: No, not me.
College Boy: I really just don't understand you guys at all.
Hubs: That makes two of us.

A few weeks ago, on a Saturday morning, Hubs was going down to the man cave to watch football. I was on the couch in the den, reading a thick paperback.

Hubs: What are you reading?
Me: The Mueller report.
Hubs (laughing): No really, what are you reading?
Me: The Mueller report.
Hubs (walking off angrily): Fine, don't tell me.

PS: I was reading the Mueller report.

I was contacted by Yummly and offered the new KitchenAid blender for free. Yeah, I get email offers at a rate of about 3 a day. I've been invited to add links to their company in specific blog posts, post their articles, write for them (mostly without payment), or promote their products in return for them mentioning my blog in their social media (fell for this one twice, with well known companies, turns out it must be opposite day, I'm the one who's supposed to promote them on my social media). Anyway . . . I signed up for the free blender. Yes, they'd like me to tag Yummly and hashtag the blender if I promote a recipe using it, but it's not required. 

Turns out, it's what they said. There's a private FB group where recipients talk about the blender and we can do whatever we want in terms of posts. 

Within 2 weeks after signing up, I was supposed to get the blender, that's what everyone who had received theirs reported. So around that time I would open the front door now and then to check for a package.

Hubs: Are you planning to run away from home?
Me: Not this minute.
Hubs: Then why do you keep opening the front door, checking to see if the coast is clear, then closing it?
Me: I'm looking for something.
Hubs: What?
Me: A blender.
Hubs (rolling his eyes): Well, you can keep looking in the front yard if it makes you happy, but if you want a little advice, you might be more successful if you checked in the kitchen.

 

Later that day: 
Hubs: Where did you order the blender from? Can you check the tracking?
Me: No, it was offered to me for free, I don't have any tracking.
Hubs: Free? Yeah right. How much did you have to pay for shipping and handling on this free blender?
Me: Nothing, it was free. 
Hubs: I'm thinking you can stop watching for it, no one's sending you a free blender. Good thing you already have one in the kitchen.
Me: It's coming, and it's way better than the one I have already. This is a new, special, super duper blender. I may not even need the food processor any more.
Hubs (rolling his eyes, again) Ok, well let me know when your invisible blender arrives, you can make me a smoothie.

My blender did arrive and it wasn't invisible. His smoothie was, though.

Now click on the links below for a peek into some other homes:

Never Ever Give Up Hope  
Menopausal Mother 
Spatulas on Parade

Pepper Jelly Glazed Taco Meatloaf

                                               ©www.BakingInATornado.com

Printable Recipe

Ingredients:

2# ground beef
3/4 cup seasoned breadcrumbs
1 packet dry onion soup mix
1/2 cup salsa (I use medium heat)
1 TBSP seeded, chopped jalapenos
3/4 cup shredded sharp cheddar cheese
2 eggs
3 TBSP taco seasoning

1/2 tsp cumin

1/3 cup jalapeno pepper jelly

Directions:
*Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Line a 9 X 13 baking dish with heavy foil.
*Gently mix all of the ingredients except the pepper jelly.  Don't over mix. Place in the prepared pan and form into a log approximately 9 inches long, 5 inches wide and 1 1/2 inches deep, leaving room along the sides.
*Bake the meatloaf for 45 minutes. Remove from the oven but leave the oven on. Using a wad of paper towels, carefully (the pan is really hot) blot the grease from the pan around the meatloaf. 
*Spread the pepper jelly over the top of the meatloaf. It will run down the sides. Return to the oven and bake for another 35 minutes. Allow to sit for 10 minutes before slicing.

Expressing Thanks in Twenty One Words: Word Counters

Counting my words again. 

Today my fellow Word Counters and I are sharing our monthly group post. The bloggers who are joining me this time all picked a number between 12 and 74 and sent it to me. I gave the numbers out as assignments to other bloggers who are then challenged to write something (or a few somethings, as the case may be) using that exact number of words. Today we all share what we came up with. 

I got the number 21. It was submitted by Dawn of Spatulas on Parade. As I've been doing in the past Word Counters posts, I'm picking a theme and using 21 words ten times based on my theme. The theme, since it's November and I'm looking forward to the upcoming holiday, is Thanks.

Thanks

~ There's nothing like having had months of being sick to really make you appreciate these times of feeling like yourself again.

~ There's nothing like being unable to sleep well for days and days to really make you appreciate the value of rest.

~ There's nothing like being unable to do the things you need to get done to make you appreciate even small accomplishments.  

~ There's nothing like months of missing a family member to really make you appreciate being able to just hug him again.

Cherry Sour Cream Cake

~ Although we shouldn't need a holiday to be thankful, the holiday does remind us to take the time to express it.

~ Safe at home, a roaring fire in the fireplace, smelling the turkey roasting in the oven, how can you not smile?

~ Not living near ski mountains has dimmed my appreciation of snow, yet there's beauty in a fresh clean white Fall snowfall.

~ Family's blood, that's true,
  it's more, I've learned from you.
  Once your support I knew,
 in my life, you're family too.

~ Bountiful delicious foods prepared with love, spread out on the beautifully set table, yet it's what's in the chairs that counts.

~ Thanks to you all for reading this blog, leaving me comments and interacting on my Facebook page, you keep me writing.

Here are links to the other Word Counters posts:

Spatulas on Parade

Wandering Web Designer
Sarah Nolan  
On the Border 
Messymimi’s Meanderings 

Cherry Sour Cream Cake        
                                                       ©www.BakingInATornado.com

Printable Recipe

Ingredients:
1 can cherry pie filling
1/2 tsp lemon extract
1 cup powdered sugar
1/2 cup oil
1 cup sour cream
3/4 cup sugar
1/2 cup brown sugar
3 eggs
1 cup milk
1 tsp vanilla
2 1/2 cups flour
1/2 tsp salt
1 1/2 tsp baking powder
1 1/2 tsp baking soda

OPT: maraschino cherries for decoration

Directions
*Grease and flour a bundt pan. Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
*Remove 1 1/2 cups of cherry pie filling from the can. Whisk the remaining filling with the lemon extract and powdered sugar and refrigerate.
*Beat the oil, sour cream, sugar and brown sugar. Beat in the eggs, milk and vanilla.
*Starting at your lowest speed, beat in the flour, salt, baking powder and baking soda just until incorporated, then increase speed to medium and beat for 2 minutes.
*Pour evenly into prepared pan. Drop the 1 1/2 cups of cherry pie filling onto the batter, spacing evenly throughout.
*Bake for approximately 35 to 40 minutes or until the edges start to brown and the center springs back to the touch. Cool for 10 minutes in the pan before running a knife carefully around the edges and invert onto a platter.
*Cool completely.
*Remove the remaining pie filling from the refrigerator and drizzle over the cooled cake. Decorate with maraschino cherries.