Tuesday, February 16, 2016

Be My Guest: Not That Sarah Michelle

I'm fortunate today to present the next post in my Be My Guest series. If you've been following along you know that I lost my dad, and as I struggle with all that entails, a number of blog friends agreed to help keep my blog going by providing me with guest posts.

I've known Sarah of Not That Sarah Michelle through blogging for so long that I can't even remember how we met any more. I can tell you this, any time I have ever needed anything she's been there for me. She and I have supported each other as we've grown our blogs and as we've honed our writing and as we've struggled personally. I love not only what she wrote today, but that she wrote it for me. Even while she was sick. She's that kind of friend.


Be My Guest: A series of Guest Posts on www.BakingInATornado.com | #blogging #bloggers #MyGraphics



Loss.

What is loss? Why do people say that we "lost" someone? We didn't LOSE them, we know what happened. Maybe it's because we feel like WE are lost without that person there. I know that, for me, when my grandma died, I felt like a piece of me was missing. Twenty three years later, I STILL feel this way.

My heart has many pieces missing that are shaped like those I love. When someone passes, a part of us passes with them. We long for a moment in time where we can speak to this person, just to tell them one final time that we love them. But if we are honest with ourselves, that is never really enough.

I've experiences a lot of loss in my life. Both of my dad's parents are gone and I miss them more than I can explain. I lost a cousin and it hit me harder than I thought it would. My maternal grandfather passed and, honestly, I felt nothing. My uncle passed and it really didn't impact me. Daily, I find myself withing for just a sign of my grandparents or my cousin, to know they are around me. Sometimes I catch a hint of familiar perfume or a passing smell of cigarettes. But is that really them?

As a follower of Christ (sorry, not a fan of the work Christian), I believe that if you live life as good as you can, you're good. I don't know what Heaven or Hell looks like. I think it's everyone's own interpretation, if that makes sense. I like to think that one day I'll be reunited with the family I loved and lost. it brings me peace. If I will or not . . . well, there is only one way to find out and I'm not quite ready for that yet. 

What I DO know is that when we experience a loss, we feel like we literally can't go on. We feel like that part that went with the person who passed was so vital to our existence, we just can't live anymore. That's not what they would want though. They would want us to live, to go on and experience our life and make them proud. They would want us to prove ourselves wrong.

We CAN go on.


About the author:
Sarah is the owner of the blog Not That Sarah Michelle, where she talks about her life, as uninteresting as it may be. She is a wife and mom with a tiny zoo of animals (okay, only 3) who lives in a small town in Kentucky. When she's not blogging, she's surfing Facebook or avoiding school work. You can find her at:
her Not That Sarah Michelle blog,
her Facebook Community
and on Twitter. 

Baking In A Tornado signature | www.BakingInATornado.com | #MyGraphics

14 comments:

  1. Thank you, Sarah, for these words of hope.

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  2. I agree Sarah I've lost a lot of people in my life too and very recently my brother and no matter how hard it is we still have to go on. We have to put one foot in front of the other and before you realize it a day has passed, a week even a month and that pain gets a little better with each passing day. Great job!

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    1. Thank you so much. It does get a little better, but we will never be whole again.

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  3. Great job Sarah. One breath at a time is all we can do.

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    1. Thank you! Absolutely, one breath at a time. Any more than that and we will hyperventilate.

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  4. Amen, I do know that your acceptance of Jesus is the ticket. Good works the train.

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  5. I love your line "My heart has many pieces missing that are shaped like those I love." What a beautiful and accurate way to put it. That's just what it feels like. I have had a few losses, too, and I try to think as you said, that they would want me to go on living, doing my best and making them proud.

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    1. I'm the exact same way. It is so important to me know believe that I've made my grandparents proud. My cousin....I just want him to know that I love him. I worry he didn't know that when he passed and that haunts me.

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  6. Letting go of people we love is the toughest thing in life.
    I haven't lost many of them yet, but I know that eventually I will, and I try not to think about it too much because it hurts too much.

    We all have that certain amount of time that we are given here - it's up to us to make meaningful connections, do what we love, share what we have, so that on the day we have to go we can say "it's been wonderful."

    Karen and Sarah, I am very sorry for your losses. I am sure they miss you and are very proud of you!

    And on a completely different note: Sarah, I don't think you avoid homework too much. How else would you provide grades this great?

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  7. I guess I'm lucky in that I haven't really felt loss the same way you seem to have. Sure all of my grandparents are dead, but two died when I was really young and unable to comprehend what I was dealing with, and the other two I had no real close relationship with, so their passing wasn't a huge impact to me. I've lost others, a brother, a cousin and an uncle, but any sadness I felt with their passing was for their families, and not for any sense of loss on my behalf. I can only hope I have to wait a long time before I feel any real sense of loss, because from what you describe, it certainly doesn't sound pleasant. Hugs to you for all the sadness you have had to deal with.

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