Tuesday, August 28, 2018

Supermarket Games

I don't watch those supermarket game shows on TV. I mean, seemingly normal people publicly racing through a grocery store like their pants are on fire, throwing items into their carts like they're on a basketball court playing a maniacal game of HORSE. Followed, of course, by timed and judged cooking.

Been there done that. Pretty much every time I shop. Including the judging {{sigh}}, although at least that waits till I get home. Only difference is I end up leaving all of my money behind. And, of course, I don't do my cooking or baking on aisle 12. Although if I could and then leave the clean up to someone else (clean up on aisle 12, get it?), I think I just might consider it.


Chocolate Peanut Layer Bars start with chocolate graham cracker crust and are layered with candy bits, dark chocolate chips, peanuts and more. Simple to make, addicting to eat. | Recipe developed by www.BakingInATornad.com | #recipe #bake

Chocolate Peanut Layer Bars

Chocolate Peanut Layer Bars start with chocolate graham cracker crust and are layered with candy bits, dark chocolate chips, peanuts and more. Simple to make, addicting to eat. | Recipe developed by www.BakingInATornad.com | #recipe #bake


Besides, I'm not talking about those kinds of games, that's TV. This is the real thing, folks, do or die. Get in, fill your cart and get out. But my point is that, as opposed to those TV shows where the rules of the game are clearly laid out, not so much in real life. If there are rules, they should be prominently displayed. And if there aren't rules, well, there should be. 

Because people need to know these things. Real life supermarket shoppers left to their own devices can be dangerous, anarchy in its most feral form. 


Supermarket Games, we all play them, but what are the rules? | Graphic property of www.BakingInATornado.com | #funny #humor




Like food selection. I once was looking to buy chicken. There was a woman looking at the packages when I walked up. I stood to the side, plenty of room for us both, made my choice, grabbed a packet and as I put it in my cart she gave me a nasty look, even said something under her breath about me being rude. Really? Can only one person choose a protein at a time? Should I have started a line behind her? Taken a number like at the deli counter?

And there's the issue of aisle protocol. If two shoppers going in different directions stop to chat, blocking the aisle, how long do I have to stand there staring, then clearing my throat before I can legitimately flat out throw a can at them? Chatting is for on your cell phone at a restaurant. Git along, little doggies.

Don't even get me started on re-stockers blocking an entire section of an aisle and acting like they have the right-of-way. A money spender trumps a money maker. Someone needs to remind management of that one. 

Or, and I love this one, shouldn't it be against some supermarket code of conduct to leave a cart unattended in the middle of an aisle while wandering off looking for some elusive item. Don't tell, but I always sneak a few items into their basket when they're not looking. Admit it, you've wanted to do that yourself.

What about the mom who brings all of her kids to the store, then ignores them as they dart back and forth and block the aisles. Is it OK to pretend my cart's a bowling ball and they're pins? Do I get an item for free if I make a strike? Other than a trip to the police station, I mean.

Speaking of carts, there's the whole issue operation. When in motion, are there road rules? Keep to the right? Is passing on the left OK? Because I've gotten many a dirty look as I buzzed by a meanderer. Guess they don't consider that my other option was to give them a bit of a nudge with my cart. 

And u-turns? Yeah or nay?
I often find myself mired in the changed my mind choice dilemma. When I've made it to one of the last aisle and see a better option to an item I chose in one of the first aisles, once I dig that reject out from the bottom of my cart, am I required to return it to wherever the hell I found it? Or can I nonchalantly peer to the right and left, make sure no-one's looking and just stick it anywhere? What's the etiquette here, do I have some kind of obligation? And if so, if I do make the long trek back to whence it came, can I charge the store a re-stocking fee?

Here's one I always find tough: how do you deal with a kid having temper tantrum in the aisle? Is it OK to give the mom a sympathetic look? After all, I've been there. Or is it best, like a beast in the wild, that we look that mom in the eye at our own peril? Perhaps we should listen first, see if she's growling . . .

Then there's the check-out line. If you're third in line and a new register opens, must you allow those ahead of you to move over ahead of you? Or is it a "snooze you lose" situation? Every woman for herself? She who gets there first wins (a faster trip home)?
 
There is one rule that I know should not only be enacted but strictly monitored for compliance: If you are tall, or even of average height and you see a woman precariously perched on tippy toes on a lower shelf, stretching to her entire 5 foot height, teetering a glass jar off of the top shelf, stop and help her. Especially (and it pains me to have to say this but I do) if you work there. Not that I'm speaking from experience or anything.



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Chocolate Peanut Layer Bars        
                                    ©www.BakingInATornado.com

Printable Recipe

Ingredients:
13 1/2 chocolate graham crackers (1 1/2 sleeves)
1 stick butter or margarine, melted
3/4 cup butterfingers baking chips
3/4 cup quick oats
1 cup dark chocolate chips 
1 cup cocktail peanuts (lightly salted) 
1 can (14 oz) sweetened condensed milk

Directions:
*Grease a 9 X 13 baking pan. Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
*Crush the chocolate graham crackers into fine crumbs. Mix with the butter and press into the bottom of the pan.
*Coarsely chop the cocktail peanuts.
*Sprinkle the prepared crust with the Butterfingers baking chips followed by the quick oats, then the dark chocolate chips and last the peanuts. Drizzle the sweetened condensed milk over the top.
*Bake for about 30 minutes or until the top is bubbling and has browned. Remove from oven.
*Allow to cool for 15 minutes. Gently run a knife around the edges. Cool completely before cutting.

14 comments:

  1. This is so on point! And what's funny? I have felt all these feels and thought I was the only one! Yes. Grocery stores definitely need rules. The only problem is that those who most need them . . . won't read them!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah, good point. Guess it will remain every woman for herself.

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  2. Grocery stores. I hate them because there are people there. People who think it's a social chat zone. People who don't realize the size their cart takes up. People who think they are the only ones in the store and will angle their cart across an aisle while they contemplate whether they should get green beans or yellow waxed. I am the person who says a very loud "Excuse me," when I find I can't get through. But I am also the one who will allow the person in front of me to get to the new register. They were in line first. I do it, knowing that it rarely happens back in return. And I will usually wait for someone to pick their chicken first if they were there first. Also knowing, it rarely happens back in return. It's my own personal grocery wars.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sounds like you've found a way to navigate the war zone.

      Delete
  3. Every grocery store in the world needs some rules!

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  4. These rules should be posted at the entrance of every supermarket. It really can be a war zone, especially on weekends. And then you go and publish this recipe. I just rejoined Weight Watchers! Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaghhh...Alana ramblinwitham.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I avoid the supermarket on the weekends like the plague. If I absolutely have to have something, I send Hubs (he has more patience than I do).

      Delete
  5. Oh my thanks for the laugh it felt good to laugh, my family are the ones chatting in the aisle like we haven't seen each other in months not hours or minutes. Yeah I want to add items to trolleys left unattended, it was only recently I noticed my sister had left her trolley unattended with her handbag in it, so being the good sister I am I took her handbag and hid to see how long it would take her to notice it missing. Took her a good 15 minutes to notice

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That's so funny, and totally something I would do.

      Delete
  6. What about the person that parks on the right and sits on the left looking at the lower shelf items thus blocking the entire aisle at that point? Also our store seems to have an unwritten rule between the aisle and that go north and south and the meat area that goes east & west that you go north closest to the meat and south on the side closer to the aisle as there are usually a bunch of displays in between the 2. But some people don't pay attention or maybe they like to mess with others and go the opposite way.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL, or maybe they just don't know the rules?

      Delete
  7. These bars sound delicious but alas I'm allergic to peanut butter and now the dr says no chocolate?!?!?! I might need bail money!

    I totally agree 100% with you! My husband and I have had conversations on all these items to the point that I think you might have bugged my home! LOL

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Either I bugged your home or we think alike. One or the other.

      Delete

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