I always said I'd marry a Smith.
Not really the recommended criteria for choosing a spouse, his name, but hear me out. My maiden name has 5 consonants (2 are the same), 3 vowels (2 are the same) and looks like someone threw all those letters in a blender and whatever order they came out in, that would be our name. It's actually a word. Just not in English. Whatever. No one ever spelled it right, no one even pronounced it correctly and by the age of, like 6, I was over it.
Smith. I'd marry a Smith. It's not that I would go searching out a Smith, per se, but I'm sure a few would cross my path. It's a common name. The most common name in the United States, actually. So really, with a plethora of Smiths walking around among us, how hard could it be to find a good one? We're tripping over them, after all.
I've never met a Smith. Figures, right? Isn't that the way it always goes (well, for me, anyway) . . . whenever you're looking for something . . .
Of course simplicity (or difficulty) of a name wasn't even in the mix when I agreed to marry Hubs. But, ever sensitive to the subject, it did dawn on me at the time, that my new last name, although not Smith, would possibly be the next best thing.
Blessing.
Who could screw up Blessing?
I recently found out. Twice.
It started with junk mail. I seemed to be getting way more than usual. Double, in fact. And that's exactly what was happening, I was getting double. One for me, and one for Karen Lessing. At my address. It seems that everything I got, she got. Ms. Lessing was approved for all of the same credit cards as me. She was encouraged to apply for a lower rate mortgage . . . on my home. She was steered to political candidates, all of them, was informed of lower cell phone rates, lower internet rates, told which streaming services would best serve her needs.
I Googled to see if there was someone with that name living in my city, but there isn't. There is another person with my (correct) name. I found out when a package for her came to me, I hunted her down, and had her come get it. Fortunately, her junk mail goes to her.
But this Lessing mail was filling up my mail box, matching me solicitation for solicitation, day after day. And she doesn't even exist. Well, not at my address anyway. Not that I know of, at least.
I would have complained less about the silly annoyance of increased junk mail, if I'd have known then what was ahead.
"You call that a name screw up," Karma asked, "hold my Margarita (I don't like beer) Pie, honey."
Frozen Strawberry Margarita Pie (no bake)
A few days later, nestled among all that crap in the mail box, were bills. Big, big, big bills. Many of them, some for thousands of dollars.
Hubs had gone for his physical to a doctor he's seen for years. There was the office visit, blood work, an MRI, a visit to a dermatologist, lab work there, you know how that goes. One or two medical appointment(s) can generate all kinds of charges from so many different places.
When Hubs scraped me off the floor, we took a close look at the bills. Surely these providers hadn't sent the charges through insurance. No, they had. This, they were all claiming, was what we owed them, and it was the full amount.
I studied those bills, and I studied that medical insurance coverage. I called the offices, all of whom confirmed they'd sent the charges to insurance, and they were denied. This just wasn't possible.
And then I saw it.
After all these years as a patient, suddenly someone in one of those offices added one little letter to our last name, changing it to Blessings. And they did it in the main computer system accessed by all of the affiliated services and providers. And not having someone named Blessings as a subscriber with Hubs' insurance plan, group, and ID#, his insurance kicked out all of the claims.
I wonder how Hubs would feel about legally changing our name. Smith. It still has a nice, easily spelled ring to it. And really, who could screw up Smith?
1 box (3 oz) lime jello mix
3 TBSP Tequilla
1 1/2 cups graham cracker crumbs
1 TBSP brown sugar
4 TBSP butter, melted
6 oz cream cheese, room temperature
11 oz bottle strawberry smoothie
3/4 cup heavy cream
1/4 cup powdered sugar
3 fresh strawberries, hulled and chopped
OPT: additional whipped cream and/or sliced strawberries for garnish
Directions:
*Heat 1/4 cup orange juice in the microwave for 1 minute. Add the jello mix and stir until dissolved. Mix in the Tequilla and set aside.
*Heat 1/4 cup orange juice in the microwave for 1 minute. Add the jello mix and stir until dissolved. Mix in the Tequilla and set aside.
*Mix together the graham cracker crumbs, brown sugar, and melted butter. Pat into the bottom and partially up the sides of a greased 10 inch pie plate. Refrigerate.
*Beat the cream cheese, jello mixture, and smoothie together for 2 minutes. Refrigerate for 45 minutes.
*Beat the heavy cream until soft peaks form. Add the powdered sugar and beat until stiff peaks hold.
*Add the strawberries to the cream cheese mixture, fold in the heavy cream, pour evenly into the crust. Garnish with whipped cream and/or sliced strawberries, if desired, and refrigerate for 1 hour.
*Move to the freezer for at least an hour. Once the pie is hard frozen, you may want to move it to the refrigerator 1/2 hour before serving.
A similar screw up had my insurance co. insisting that anesthesia for cataract surgery was not covered! yes, sure, slice my eye open while I am aware and awake. It took months to find the clerical error in the Physician owned clinic records when they changed an insurer number between the first and second surgeries. Margaritas would have helped!!!
ReplyDeleteMargarita (and Margarita Pie) always helps.
DeleteWhat a mess! I hope things are straightened out soon...and stay that way.
ReplyDeleteYes, we got it worked out . . . this time . . . I'm with you, hope it stays that way.
DeleteBack in KY there was a man with the same name as my hubby and we had to prove it wasn't him because they said he was a child's father. Then two weeks the same girl (now a grown up) came to us thinking the same thing. By the end of the conversation we decided to honorary adopt her as part of our family.
ReplyDeletePerfect response!!
DeleteOur names are not always unique which can be both good and annoying
ReplyDeleteVery true, there's good and bad to everything.
DeleteLong ago, a then co-worker was stopped by the police several times while driving because someone with his name was wanted for murder, and, to make it worse, this wanted person drove the same make of car. What a mess that was, until it was straightened out. Those clerical errors in medical billing and records can happen so easily, with sometimes disastrous results. Alana ramblinwitham.blogspot.com
ReplyDeleteYour friends situation was WAY worse than mine, that could have been dangerous.
DeleteWell, my only story like that involved my Mom. Growing up Catholic, you got used to the parade of "Masses to be said", for recently deceased parishioners. And so, too, with my Mom. However, in a months time they screwed up her name- and admittedly, Ursula wasn't all that common, but- not once, not twice, but 3 times. I don't remember the first two, but by far the third version- Urusual- blew them all away.
ReplyDeleteYou'd think in that particular situation, where there are mourning family members, that they would be particularly careful about getting a name right.
DeleteBoth my maiden and married names have been mangled in spelling and pronunciation. Smith would have been quite welcome.
ReplyDeleteYup, thought Blessing would do it but, nope.
DeleteBeautiful blog
ReplyDeleteThank you.
DeleteAs a person who have always had to spell out last name AND street name to get it right, i feel with you. I also once dreamt of an easy married name, but no, not going to happen ;) I have accepted the situation, and spell and explain every time around.
ReplyDeleteLooks like, even with what I thought was an easy last name, I have to as well.
DeleteThat sounds very refreshing on a hot day.
ReplyDeleteAbsolutely!
Delete