Inconvenient Convenience: Word Counters

 

Counting my words again!

Today my fellow Word Counters and I are sharing our monthly group post. Each month, one group member picks a number between 12 and 50. All participating bloggers are then challenged to write something (or a few somethings, as the case may be) using that exact number of words. Today we share what we all came up with.

This month's number is 33. 

It was chosen by Me!

~ I've often used this post to air my complaints about the lack of customer service. Today it's about convenience, inconvenience, being denied the choice of shopping in store, being forced to shop online.

~ I like the convenience of shopping online, comparing prices, availability, ship time and fees, even having the convenience of being able to choose store pick up (if that's an option), or home delivery.

~ What I don't like is not being able to see and touch the merchandise. They can use all the descriptive words they can imagine, but it's just not the same as hands on.

~ Hubs needed a new laptop, knew what he wanted, but it was expensive. After daily checks, Hubs found it on sale. We checked our local store and success! Hubs and PurDude drove off. 

~ They were gone quite a while when PurDude called to ask what time I'd planned dinner. Dinner I knew immediately that had to be a bad omen since it was only one thirty.

Chicken and Snap Pea Dinner

~ So . . . they found the laptop, and took it up to the counter to pay. But it was ringing up at regular price. "That's because," the clerk explained, "you're looking for the online price."

~ Could he get the online price? No. Hubs had to stand in the check out line and order it online for store pick up. Once ordered, Hubs asked again for the sale price.

~ No, again. PurDude and Hubs were told that they now had to wait about an hour for order fulfillment. To fulfill the order, for the item Hubs was holding, in the checkout line.

~ Almost two hours later they returned empty handed. Update: the order is in the fulfillment queue and would be filled when his turn came, no exceptions for a customer standing there, they'd email.

~ Six hours later, after speaking to another store employee, Hubs was told the order was being expedited (LOL), he'd be emailed soon. Seven hours after ordering, the store closed. No email, no laptop.

~ Silence from Best Buy. The order wasn't ready in an hour, or another half hour, nor was it being expedited. All lies. Twenty seven hours after ordering, they agreed to turned it over.

~ Their claim of shopping convenience? Turning away a customer holding expensive electronics in one hand and a credit card in the other, telling him to pay online, then wait . . . a day? Decidedly inconvenient.

Here are links to the other Word Counters posts:

On the Border 

Messymimi’s Meanderings 

Chicken and Snap Pea Dinner         

                                                                                      ©www.BakingInATornado.com

Printable Recipe

Ingredients:
1 1/4 cups instant brown rice

2 cups cooked chicken, chopped

1/3 cup Canadian bacon, chopped

3 oz snap peas

1 can chicken and rice soup

1 1/4 cups chicken broth

1/3 cup chopped onion

1/2 tsp minced garlic

1/4 tsp pepper

Directions:
*Preheat oven to 400 degrees. Grease an 8 X 11 baking dish.

*Sprinkle the rice evenly onto the bottom of the baking dish. Top with the chicken, Canadian bacon, and snap peas.

*Mix together the chicken and rice soup, chicken broth, onion, garlic and pepper. Pour even into the baking dish. Cover with tin foil.

*Bake for 30 minutes. Carefully remove the tin foil, and bake for another 30 minutes, until the rice has absorbed the liquid.

*Stir before serving. 

 

 

Stop Dancing

 

Dancing pubic hair. 

 

Final answer.

 

OK, so dancing and singing too. And it turns out (I only know because I googled it), the singing is actually being done by a well known (although not by me) rapper, Princess Nokia. Actually, I'm not really sure if there is truly a Princess Nokia (isn't that a cell phone or something?), or google's just punking me. 

Let me start back at the beginning. 

 

I told you that PurDude bought me a full season subscription to all the Red Sox games to stream via the MLB app. And I love it. Despite the fact that the Red Sox kinda suck this year. And no matter how loud I yell at the TV, their manager does not listen to my sage advice.

But I ❤ the Red Sox. It's even the name of my 15th blog post, from way back in the day. So I watch the games, every one.

The downside of the MLB app is that, between innings it shows commercials. The same ones. Over and over and over again. For 4 hours. 

 

I've talked about commercials before on this blog, the good, the bad, and the ugly. Right now I'm a bit confused by the Wendy's ad. Apparently they've changed their fries to make them hot and crispy. I don't eat fast food too often, and the nearest Wendy's isn't close by, so someone's going to have to let me know, what were their fries before? Cold and mushy?

Then there's my current favorite commercial, the one that I laugh at. Every. Single. Time. It's a cryptocurrency commercial featuring Larry David taking on different roles at different times in history. In the end, he's with the founding fathers, discussing the constitution and giving the right to vote to all citizens. David's response: "even the stupid ones?"

I'm laughing just typing it. And I can't help wondering, given what's going on in our country today, if maybe the founding fathers should have rethought that whole "giving the right to vote to the stupid ones" thing.

But the commercial I can't escape right now, is one that MLB has been showing me over and over again (and it's being featured on social media too, I hear). I try to find something to do in the kitchen when it comes on but, honestly, how many times a night can you make dinner? 

 

Artichoke Rice

 

 

The commercial is for Venus pubic hair razors. It's a song about pubic hair, sung pubic hair, and danced to by . . . wait for it . . . pubic hair.

 

Full disclosure, I had a few different reactions to this commercial. First time? I thought I was hallucinating. Second time, it actually had a bit of an amusing quality, made me laugh. Once. Third time in 10 minutes, not so much. Two hundred and eighty fifth time, I'm over it. 

 

Stop dancing! Please.

But more than that, I have questions.

First of all, I don't mean to be sexist. I am, after all, a woman who watches a lot of sports, but I just have to ask . . . who is it that told Venus that MLB fans are their target audience? Or are they trying to send a subliminal message to men to put this item in their "gift for the significant other" file? 'Cause I gotta say, that probably won't go over well.

I also can't help being grateful that this commercial has come up at this time. Can you imagine if we were watching these games with friends or neighbors when our kids were young and this came on? I can just hear the questions now:

"Mom, what are pubes?"

"Do yours sing and dance?"

"Won't that razor thing hurt them?"

"Will they cry?"

 

"What happens if you want them back?"

 

Here's a question I can easily answer. And no, it's not if the pubes formed a baseball team, do I think they could beat the Red Sox. It's what is the one commercial I can live the rest of my Red Sox loving life never seeing again?

Dancing pubic hair.

 

Final answer.

Artichoke Rice        

                                                                                      ©www.BakingInATornado.com

Printable Recipe

Ingredients:
2 cups instant rice

1 can (about 13 oz) artichoke hearts

3/4 cup seasoned croutons

1 can (10.5 oz) cream of celery soup

1/2 cup sour cream

1/2 cup half and half

1/2 tsp salt

1/4 tsp pepper

1/3 cup sliced almonds

1/2 cup shredded pepper jack

1/2 cup shredded provolone

1/4 cup grated parmesan

Directions:
*Preheat the oven to 350 degrees. Grease a 1 1/2 quart casserole dish.

*Cook the rice according to package directions. Set aside.

*Drain the artichoke hearts, pat dry, and coarsely chop. Set aside.

*Crush the croutons. Set aside.

*In a bowl, whisk together the soup, sour cream, half and half, salt, and pepper. Gently mix in the rice, artichoke, almonds, cheeses, and 1/4 cup of the crushed croutons. Pour evenly into the casserole dish. Sprinkle with the remaining crushed croutons. Cover.

*Bake for 45 minutes. Uncover and bake for another 10 minutes.

Splat: Secret Subject Swap

 

 

 

Welcome to a Secret Subject Swap. This month 4 brave bloggers picked a secret subject for someone else and were assigned a secret subject to interpret in their own style. Today we are all simultaneously divulging our topics and submitting our posts. Read through mine and at the bottom you’ll find links to all of today’s other Secret Subject participants.

 

 

My subject is: The First Friday in August is "National Water Balloon Day" - Let's celebrate!
It was submitted by: Tamara of Part-time Working Hockey Mom.

National Water Balloon Day? Since I've been invited to this celebration (thanks, Tamara), I call dibs on being the thrower! 

 

Oh, this is gonna be fun. 

 

First of all, let's get down to the specs of this operation. First, these aren't going to be any baseball sized balloons. Size matters and, as long as we're talking about sports, I'm thinking basketball.

 

Second, in deference to my pitching arm, and your reading time, I'm limiting myself to 10 subjects. I'll have to choose wisely.

And third, no one's off the table. Unless I take them off.

There are a few (well, a category of) people who I do want to take out of the bullseye, I know you'll be surprised, but I'll tell you why. I'm going to stay away from politics. OK, I may not succeed, but I'm going to try. Because if I really wanted to target every political figure deserving of a good cold soaking, a day won't do it, I'll need a week. Maybe two.

Speaking of trying, I'm going to make an attempt to be respectful of certain positions (deserved or not), meaning, although it pains me, I'll be taking Brett Kavanaugh and Amy Coney Barrett off the list too. 

That said . . .

1) Ginni Thomas. And really, if her spouse is standing close to her, well, that's out of my control, collateral damage.

 

 

 

 

2) Patrick Byrne. A former Overstock CEO in an unhinged White House Election Deniers Anonymous support meeting? I'm not sure if he needs to be hit with a water balloon, or bonked over the head with a My Pillow guy. Two birds, one stone, I like it!

Speaking of birds:

3) LiMu Emu (and Doug).

 

4) Alex Cora. Yes, you read that right. I'm a huge lifelong Red Sox fan. I've always respected the of knowledge and leadership of their managers, Alex Cora, and Terry Francona before him. But this year? I could manage the team better. In fact, I do. Loudly. From my couch. Ask Hubs.

5) Front door litterers. You know who I mean, everyone who puts flyers and circulars in my door daily. Political, lawn service, pest control, painters, window installers, religious evangelists . . . This is an easy one, I don't even have to go anywhere, just hang out the window upstairs, and let 'em fly (or drop, actually).

 

Oh, but note to self: put on your glasses before the "whole bombs" away thing. DO NOT, I repeat, do not let that thing go until you're sure the stranger standing at the door isn't from GrubHub, DoorDash, or UberEats. Because a wet dinner? No bueno.

 

Street Corn Rice

 

 

6) Caitlin Jenner. Come out as transgender? Good for you. Come out as a trump supporting Fox "news" contributor? Splat.

 

7) The self-checker militia. I rarely go into Walmart any more. Not only do they expect me to check myself out, but to stand in line to do it. And as if that's not enough, when I get to the door, they want me to put down my bags, find the receipt, and prove that I did a good job of doing their job.

 

8) Kid Rock. He's no kid, and that's not rock.

 

9) Gloria Allred: The embodiment of an attorney dedicated to protecting women's rights who lets her notoriety go to her head and becomes a self-aggrandizing media hound.

 

10) Ginger (not so) Luckey Gaetz: "Oh look, a guy under investigation for sex trafficking, I think I'll marry him," says no sane woman ever.

The only problem is something I'm reminded of from a few years ago. It was the beginning of August, like it is now, and I was out mowing my back lawn. Just as I was getting to the rows along our property line, the neighbor's sprinklers came on. And on a 90 plus degree day, I was not unhappy. It felt great.

 

So maybe, instead of punking my list, I'd be doing them all a favor? Joke's on me?

 

That just won't do.

 

I submit, and someone please tell me who I need to talk to, that we move this celebration. Not much going on after the first of the year. How does January sound? 

 

And don't worry, I won't be taking away your summer fun. After all, July 1st is Pie in the Face Day.

 

Here are links to all the sites now featuring Secret Subject Swap posts. Sit back, grab a cup, and check them all out. See you there:

The Diary of an Alzheimer’s Caregiver 

Climaxed

Part-time Working Hockey Mom 

Street Corn Rice        

                                                                                      ©www.BakingInATornado.com

Printable Recipe

Ingredients:
1 ear of corn, shucked, silk removed

1 TBSP mayonnaise

1/2 tsp chili powder, divided

1/8 tsp salt

1/8 tsp pepper

1/4 tsp lime zest

1 TBSP butter

1/2 tsp minced garlic

1 cup vegetable broth

1 cup instant rice

1 tsp lime juice

1 tsp chopped cilantro

1/4 cup crumbled Cojita cheese

Directions:
*Preheat the grill to medium/medium high (about 375 degrees). While the grill is heating, mix together the mayonnaise, 1/4 tsp chili powder, salt, pepper, and lime zest. Using a pastry brush, coat the corn with this mixture.

*Place the corn on the grill and cook until the bottom browns, turn slightly. Continue to cook and turn until all sides are brown, about 10 minutes total). Remove from the grill and cool.

*Cut the thicker end of the corn, just to flatten. Place the corn, flat side down, and run a knife from the top to the bottom along all sides to remove the kernels. Discard the cob (or save for soup).

*Place a pan on the stove over medium heat. Melt the butter, then add the garlic. Cook and stir for 1 minute. Add the corn kernels, cook and stir another minute.

*Add the vegetable broth and remaining chili powder to the pot. Bring to a boil. Add the rice, cover, remove from the stove and allow to sit for 10 minutes. Stir the lime juice, cilantro, and Cojita cheese into the rice, mix well and serve.