Fly on the Wall: You Picked Me What?

Welcome to a monthly Fly on the Wall group post. Today 12 bloggers are inviting you to catch a glimpse of what you’d see if you were a fly on the wall in our homes. Come on in and buzz around my house. At the end of my post you’ll find links to this month’s other participants’ posts.

Hubs: I cannot find my baseball glove anywhere.
Me: It's in the top of one of the lockers in the laundry room.
Hubs (coming out of the laundry room): Oh, I found it.
Me: Yeah, I'm sure it had nothing to do with me telling you where it is. What do you need it for, you haven't touched that thing since the kids stopped playing baseball.
Hubs: One of my clients asked if I want to join his league, it's just recreational softball, nothing too competitive. I thought I'd throw the ball around, see if I still have an arm. I know I can run the bases and I'm sure I can still hit a ball.
Me: Hit the ball? You won't be able to see it coming at you.
Hubs: What do you mean?
Me: Aren't you the same guy who was just holding  a paper up to the light bulb and squinting?
Hubs: Well, I could wear my glasses when I bat.
Me: Your reading glasses? Yeah, I'm sure that's gonna end well.
So what do you think the odds are that I'll be sitting in a hospital waiting room some time in the next month?

PurDude was late coming home from work. It wasn't a big deal but I was curious as to why he was late.
Me: Why are you late?
PurDude: Well, I left work a little late and there was a problem on the way home.
PurDude is now in the bathroom with the door shut and I'm standing outside it with my heart in my throat yelling through the door.
Me: DO NOT do that to me. What happened? Are you OK?
PurDude comes out and hands me a piece of paper: This is partly my fault and partly a misunderstanding.
Me (reading): What part of a speeding ticket is a misunderstanding?
PurDude: Well, the speed limit was 40. I thought it was 45.
Me: But you were going 55.
PurDude: Yeah, that's the "my fault" part.

 

 PurDude: That cop who gave me that ticket was a prick.

Me: No, honey, you were driving too fast and he gave you a ticket.

PurDude: He didn't just give me a ticket.

Me: What are you talking about?

PurDude: You know that lei I have hanging from my mirror? 

Me: Yes.

PurDude: He said it blocks my view and he gave me a warning.

Me: Well, he was right to mention it if he felt it was unsafe.

PurDude: He didn't mention it, he gave me a written warning. He gave me a ticket AND a written warning.

Me: Prick. 

 

I was reading a friend's facebook status. She posted a picture of the beautiful bouquet of (weed) flowers her 4 year old daughter had picked for her. Awwww. So cute.

That afternoon the heat broke a bit and College Boy went for a walk. Not to be outdone, my son picked me a weed too.

Yeah, that's exactly what you think it is.


 

So . . . speaking of my kid driving me nuts . . . guess who followed me on twitter this month . . .

 

Taco Rice

Taco Rice with Crusted Spicy Chicken Breasts

Suddenly, a week ago, it was the day before PurDude was going back to school. I'm not sure how a whole summer went by in the blink of an eye, but then I'm not sure how his whole childhood did either.

Me (looking him right in the face): See, I'm not crying.
PurDude: Yeah, we'll see how long that lasts. Yup, there you go. Good job, Mom, you lasted 3 whole seconds.
Me: No, I'm still not crying.
PurDude: Really? Why is your face wet between your eyes and your chin?
Me: Well, my eyes are leaking. That's totally not the same as me crying.

And that, my friends, is when I got my last eye roll of the summer from this particular kid.

And then the day came to send PurDude off. Ten hours on the road and the end result is that I won't see my son for months. 

After about 9 of those endless hours, the road signs seem to be reading your mind.

Exactly.

 

Luckily College boy, who's local, is still around rolling his eyes at me. And I'm stupid enough to be giving him more reasons. Like the other day when I was standing in the office waiting for a recipe to print.

College Boy: Mom, you've been just standing there looking in one spot for a while, are you ok?
Me: Yes, just waiting for the printer to come on and print a recipe idea I typed out.
College Boy: It doesn't take more than a second.
Me: I know, weird, huh?
College Boy: Just guessing here, but are you sure you clicked "print".

I walk nonchalantly (ie: run) back into the kitchen to check the laptop. Where the print screen is sitting open waiting for me to click "OK". I click the box and abracadabra the printer starts.

College Boy (walking away, rolling his eyes): I don't even want to think about how long you would have stood there . . .

Hubs was outside doing some yard work. I generally let him do whatever he wants out in the yard, but I do have lilac shrubs growing along the side of our house and I'm very picky about anyone touching them. The one on the end gets more sun and tends to grow out of control.

So Hubs comes into the hallway from the garage with a giant pair of razor sharp clippers and yells to me in the den:

Hubs: Hey . . . OK if I clip your bush?

And I cannot tell you how happy I was to have had a pile of teenaged boys in the kitchen at the time.

One of the perks of blogging that I never even imagined is the interactions I get on my Baking In A Tornado FB page both about my blog posts and just in general, like this one following last month's Fly on the Wall post mentioning Hubs' stop at the cell phone store to get his phone fixed (ie: turned back on):
Kelli: OMG! Your boys really know how to push buttons, don't they? One question about your husband, is he blind?
Well, I thought that was a strange and slightly insensitive thing to post, but I answered:
 Me: Ha, not blind, just severely tech impaired.
Kelli: I meant blonde. Damn autocorrect.
Me: LOL, actually he IS blonde.
Kelli: OK, that explains it.
Me:  LOL, one of my boys is blonde too.
Kelli: College Boy?
. . . and now I'm wondering if I actually do have a fly on the wall . . .

Now click on the links below for a peek into some other homes:

Spatulas on Parade

Follow me home

Menopausal Mother

Never Ever Give Up Hope

Just A Little Nutty

The Momisodes

Someone Else's Genius

Sanity Waiting to Happen

Southern Belle Charm
Go Mama O 
Dinosaur Superhero Mommy 

Taco Rice

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Printable Recipe 

Ingredients:
2 TBSP margarine
1/2 cup vermicelli, chopped
1/4 cup chopped onion
1 tsp chili powder
1 tsp cumin
1 1/2 cups chicken broth
1/4 cup salsa
1/2 cup cooked corn kernels
1 TBSP cilantro
1 1/2 cups instant rice 

Directions: 
*Melt the margarine in a pot. Once melted and hot add the vermicelli and onion. Cook over medium heat, stirring constantly, until the onion has softened and the vermicelli starts to brown.
*Stir in the chili powder and cumin just until incorporated. Then immediately add the chicken broth, salsa, corn and cilantro. Raise the heat slightly and bring to a boil.
*Stir in the rice. Cover and remove from the heat. Allow to sit for 5 to 10 minutes until all of the liquid is incorporated into the rice. Stir before serving.